Baby this is paradise (Completed)

Chapter 12

Triggering to some

Irises pov

I woke up on the couch at Payton's house. I sat up slowly and looked around at my surrounding. I saw that tony, Payton, Asher, and Easton were sitting at the table. they were talking about something, but I was to tired to listen to what they were saying. I looked around from my phone. I saw that it was on the coffee table an so I grabbed it. the time read 4 pm. I rubbed and I scared myself with my now jet black hair. I gotta get used to this. I got up an I walked in the kitchen. I sat down in between tony and Asher and I leaned my head on Tony's shoulder and yawned. tony put his arm around me and sighed.

"What did you do last night?" I heard Payton ask.

I thought for a moment. I remember getting my hair colored, and going to the bar, and then that's pretty much it.

"I uhh, remember getting my hair colored, and drinking with Andrew, an I sorta remember walking on some train tracks." I thought for another moment.

A sudden realization hit me and I could tell that everybody noticed.

"What's wrong?" I heard Asher ask rubbing the back of his finger up and down my arm soothingly.

Just then I started to cry. everything just hit me like a pile of bricks, going over to my dads house, and what he said, and me bailing at an attempt. Tony tried calming me down as I felt a panic attack kick in. I saw Easton with a worried face. my breathing quickened and I felt as if I had no air in my lungs. I was placed on the ground and tony held me close. this went on for about a half hour before I was calmed.

"I need to see dad." I mumbled as I got up from the ground and ran out the door.

Once I got to dads house, I flung the door open and I saw my dad on the couch, without a beer in his hand. that's really strange for me and probably for him to. I walked carefully closer to him. I noticed something odd about him. he was cold, and not breathing. I saw a note on the couch beside him and I picked it up with a tears in my eye.

You were right

Was all it said. Tears were running down my face a I called 911. I saw tony run into the house.

________________________

It was now 8 pm and I haven't spoken to anybody. I kept my mouth shut. nobody truly knew what was going inside his brain. I got a glimpse of what he was feeling last night. I'm pretty sure everybody was wondering why i was taking it so hard, and the will never under stand. I looked over the note, hoping that the words would change. I feel like I should have helped him. it wasn't his fault that he started drinking. his rock, and his main support died a couple years ago. I should have helped him through his dark time. I feel awful about this whole thing. he didn't deserve to die, even after what he did to Easton and I. the worst part is that tomorrow is Payton and I's birthday. how can I celebrate something so happy when everything is so sad? If I didn't get off of that train tracks, every body would have gone to two funerals. that makes me very anxious. Tony has not left my side. my head was on his shoulder and he had his arm around me. he called my boyfriend over like ten minutes ago, he should be here soon. I could use the comfort. I heard the door open but I didn't bother to look up because I knew who it was. I heard Payton whisper something along the lines of she has been like this for a while now. I heard footsteps get closer to me and I felt tony moved away. Andrew sat down next to me and he pulled me into his lap.

"What's wrong?" he whispered.

He already knew what was wrong, I heard tony tell him over the phone. I think he is just trying to get me to talk. I stay silent.

"Can you please answer me?" he said softly.

He seems to actually care about me now. his personality is so much better that how it was before. I feel like I can trust him again. I leaned my head in his chest an I sighed. I felt a tear run down my cheek and I felt him wipe it away.

"What's wrong? tell me please." He said.

"Every thing I fucked up with my life, after I dropped you off, I found the train tracks, a train came at me, and I just stood their not moving, I wanted that train to hit me, but yet again, I didn't, I'm just so confused right now." I choked out.

I felt myself get pulled in closer and I felt him sigh and kiss the top of my head. I fell asleep in his arms, feeling sorta safe with him.

Authors note
Depressing, don't hate me, more  drama coming in quick I promise, even if it's already drama filled. Love yea turtles.