A Hypocrite's Guide to Not Sounding Hypocritical

Fan Fictions

Luckily for me I haven't seen that many horrifyingly terrible fan fictions but that's because over the time I've been here, I've figured out how to find decent fan fictions. So to get to the point.

Fan fictions-
FNAF
X-Men
Avengers
Doctor Who
Sherlock
YouTubers

FNAF- I don't know what's more disturbing. The fact that you can fall in love with an animatronic or that you feel the need to fuck the animatronic. Like what the actual FUCK!

You're a freaking human that finds Foxy foxy. How is a robotic animal that has no feelings and only sings stupid songs sexy?! But of course if you're also an animatronic then it's okay but come on! Let those creative juices flow!

X-Men- some of the fan fictions I've found are really good. Mainly because the style of writing I like has no sappy love story as the main plot of the entire book. I can honestly say that I would prefer a book that has no love story rather then a really good love story. I'm just not into that kind of stuff. But anyway.

Avengers- Ok. I cannot tell you how much I would like to smack some the people on here who think it's okay to be some special kid that's trying to find their way in the world and they just happen to stumble upon the SHEILD corporation only to be dragged into the Avengers initiative to fall in love with one of them!!! Who freaking cares if you like one of 'em?! People like me just are foaming at the mouth for some kind of action within these books. And not sexual action. Jeez. I talking about massive fights that leave Tony Stark bleeding in the center of his body because he couldn't dodge that spear from one of the many villains he has fought. I want to read something about how the hero gets hurt trying to save the people that could've cared less about him before he saved their lives. I want villains who actually would be considered heroes if they hadn't been caught in that one situation that changed their view on the entire race of humanity. That's what I want from the Avengers fan fictions. I want them to be BETTER THEN THE MOVIE!

Doctor Who- I'm sick and tired of the fucking Female Timelord drama. Can't you be more creative? THE DOCTOR WAS THERE WHEN GALLIFREY BURNT!!!!! He was freaking there. So don't you bullshit me when you say that she survived the explosions. Now before I go any further, I want you guys to know that I have read some pretty good Female Timelord stories. The reason why they were good was because the author explained why she was a Timelord. In one case was when this girl found the doctor while he was regenerating and she inhaled the gold dust the comes off him when he regens. Just be creative. Please.

Also, the whole falling in love with him is just ridiculous. Because he would never fall in love with someone who will most likely die before him. So just give me something with less romance and more action.

Sherlock- I get it. I really do. Most of us would absolutely die if they were able to meet THE Sherlock Holmes. I know I would. But you don't have to rub it in our faces that your character has met him. Let alone fall for him. Cause you know I'm sure almost every girl including some boys really would fall for him. But seriously? Do you have to tell us about how sweet his tongue was in- *gags* inside your mouth? *gags* for realz though. So please don't make your character's relationship with him extremely personal. I've read enough of those.

YouTubers- If you like Jacksepticeye: Go to JakSeptic s profile. I'm sure you'll find at least one their stories that fits your acception s. Seriously. I'm not even joking.

Now. I'm actually okay with the whole "doing love" with them. I have no idea why. But anyway. Some things I don't want to find ever again.
•Moving in next to _____. (Just stop. We all know that the only reason you moved there was to get into ____ pants. So just stop.)
•Being adopted by _____. (I know for a fact that most of the YouTubers I watch probably wouldn't adopt a thirteen year old. They'd much rather make their own baby or adopt someone younger. I'm not sure about Mark though. I think if he could, he'd adopt all of his followers. Is that just me?)
•_______X Reader. (These usually end up extremely messed up or you guys only talk about how you love eachother. BE CREATIVE!)

Is this helping at all? Should I stop? Can you peeps give me some more cliches that I could look into? Please?