This is a fucked up cruel joke that's been played out on us over and over and over again ( please know we're not the only ones to get hurt this time ) every single time any kind of emotional feeling has been felt by us, and we do mean every time, we're aloud to start feeling like hey maybe this time it won't happen...then just like that..we get our hearts ripped out once again..cept this time think the cruelty of it went beyond cruel as it just wasn't us that's going to hurt...
Why does GOD hate us so bad? Why can't we ever get to know or be able to share our hopes our strengths with another? Like it wouldn't make us feel good to support another? To be needed by another? To be able to let another they didn't have to go alone? All I yeah me ,ever have wanted was to feel love from another and be able to give everything I could to another to support them, need them, validate them, give 100% of my time, my care, my love to them.
Any time I've ever dared show feelings for another something, circumstance, age, positon ,job, something makes that want into something dirty...
I'll be honest...won't ever say a name..she made me feel as I've never felt, she was a flame that I could not ,we could not, stop From being drawn to her..this was a very first..shit, as usual,got in the way. Because of circumstances beyond our control,we have to let go.(maybe it would not have worked, Don't know, but could have at least let us find out longer then the cruelty if this fuck you)
It's just fucking not fair..God.. why..why the fuck this time..with her did you have to shatter me again so fucking completely and viciously. .and do same to her..fuck you!! your not a God your a fucking demon....Hurt the fuck out of us fine you do anyway..but did you have to hurt her??
YOU ARE READING
Random darkness
General Fiction*this story is very descriptive and may be considered triggering. Be in a safe frame of mind when reading* Thought wanderings of a depressed mess...No real rhyme or reason..insights about death, suicide, self injury, self hate,bullying, abuse. Allot...
