What About Me?

Chapter Eight

Jynx.

Everything was finally moved into my new house and living by myself was good for me. We've got the car wash up and running and money was starting to come in, of course not as much as I'm use to but it was enough to make a living. I've been so busy trying to get everything together I haven't seen Aubree or Karina in a week or so.

I talked to them on the phone a lot but today I finally get a free day to see them. I'll be getting more free time now that the car wash is settled. I couldn't stop getting that warm feeling every time I thought about Aubree.

I was snapped out of thought when I heard the doorbell ring. A smile grew on my face as I went to answer the front door. "Lexis!" Karina almost yelled clinging to me tightly. "Someone must've missed me." I laughed placing her back down and closing my door behind her. "I haven't seen you in forever."

"K, it's only been a week."

"Exactly... Forever."

"Hi daddy." Aubree smiled as she waltzed through the door. "Hi Aubree. What were you doing outside?"

"I saw a pretty bird and I wanted it but it flew away." I shook my head at her response. "I'll buy you a bird."

"Really?" She grabbed my hand and her eyes lit up. "Yeah, I'll get it for you later." She nodded her head and ran off. "Really Lexis?"

"What?" I shrugged my shoulders. "Stop spoiling her, she's gonna be a brat."

"Like you?" I could tell she was having a hard time trying not to laugh. "Anyways, I'm going to help myself to a tour... Care to come along?" She smiled and grabbed my hand before I could answer. Her curiosity was always cute.

I followed behind her as she went upstairs and looked through every door she could find. We got to the last door down the long hallway and she opened it to see my master bedroom. Clearly it was occupied cause my bed was a mess.

I gave her about 10 seconds before her urge to clean my room started kicking in. Sure enough, I was correct. "Why don't you ever make your bed?" She shook her head fluffing up my pillow. "I never have time, and when I have time I'm in it, sleeping."

It was interesting to see such a small person make a such a big bed all alone, but she made it work. I watched leaning on the door frame as she fell back on my bed and cuffed her hands behind her head. "I love your house, everything is so bright and cozy." My entire house consisted of only 4 colors, literally. "Thank you, you know I'm not a fan of too many colors."

"Trust me, I know. Our old house was completely white, it was almost scary to bring fruit punch home." She laughed and turned her eyes toward where I was standing. "Come here." She scooted over and patted the bed.

I sat next to her while she stared at me. "What?" I laughed trying to figure out what she wanted. "When did you get this?" She gently brushed her small fingers over the tattoo of Aubree's face and name. "A week after I got out."

"It's beautiful..."

"She's beautiful... like her mom." I kissed her forehead and stood up walking toward my bathroom. "So how's work? Have you heard from G? Are you doing alright?" I called out multiple questions accidentally but she didn't seem to mind.

"Work is fine, I got a 5% raise and I haven't heard from him so I guess we're done but I'm okay with it."

"Give him a month or two, he'll be back. We all come back."

"Lexis you know, I'm not really sure if I want him to come back." I stood in the doorway to my bathroom and watched her sigh. "Why?"

"I don't know, it's like I'm not sure if I really love him anymore. I find it strange how all my feelings for him are just fading away so quickly after all these years and I'm just wondering... Maybe it's because the love I had for him wasn't as real as I thought."

"Well to me, love means a variety of things. It's beyond just caring about someone. You'd do anything for a person to be happy and safe, make them feel comfortable and protected, they can trust you with everything and stick by your side through hell. To be in love with someone is when they're the only person you see, your everything. Love for someone can be distorted sometimes depending on how strong it was. There's different levels to love but if it's the powerful kind... You always find a way to forgive them for their mistakes and sometimes it's repeatedly. You don't want to leave their side... until you get tired of the pain and the constant mistakes. You have to be careful not to be blinded by it, because they may not feel the same amount of love for you as you do for them and they'll take advantage of your urge to always forgive. Sometimes you actually need a wall to put up."

"Wow..."

"What?"

"That was just... beautiful. Wow." She giggled a little to herself. "Yeah yeah... It's just up to you to think about."

"Daddy!" Aubree yelled to the top of her lungs from downstairs. "Duty calls." I smiled and walked out the room.

"Why are you yelling so loud baby girl?" I said as I stepped down the stairs. "I want to go outside." She jumped up and down trying to get me to move but soon realized she was failing. "How about I take you and mommy out to dinner? I can get you ice cream and brownies."

"Yay!" She screamed hugging my legs tightly. "What's all the yelling about down here?" Karina laughed, joining the party. "Daddy wants to take us to dinner and I get to have ice cream and brownies!"

"Oh really?" She asked more so towards me. "Yes really, but only if mommy approves." She nodded her head and grabbed both of my hands. "Thank you Lexis... for everything."

"Group hug!" Aubree cheesed clinging to both of our sides. "Why is she always yelling?" Karina shook her head at her. "Well... maybe she gets that from her mom too."

"Shut up Lexis! I do not yell all the time."

"Whatever you say. You two ready to go?"

"Yes!" We both said in unison.

***

"What the fuck was that shit back there J?!" Soma yelled once we got back to the bando. "How was I suppose to know you were alive? The building fucking exploded! Did you want me to sit and wait for a pig in uniform? Fuck that, I'm not going to jail! You know it's always one man for himself if a plan goes bad! I didn't know you got out the building nigga you lucky I saw yo ass on the ground cause I was this close from leaving!"

"Yo Jynx, that's fucked up man." He pointed in my face and walked out slamming the door behind him. I don't care if he's mad. That nigga know the deal and how was I suppose to know he didn't get blown up with the rest of the building? I wasn't about to wait around to find out and risk going to jail for the rest of my life.

"Don't worry about him J, just let him cool off. Go home, be safe."

"Aight man, I'm out."

I left from the shabby-looking building and pulled up to my condo within minutes.