"I can't...I'm so tired"
"I know you're tired, but you can do it. Just one more big push and she'll be here. You can do it Ashley"
She was so exhausted. She'd been at it for hours and she was starting to look pale. I was getting worried something was wrong with her, but they kept pushing for her to keep going. I think she would've been better off doing a c-section, but they didn't think it was necessary. I was trying to stay positive and encouraging, but something about this didn't feel right. She was so weak but mustered up enough energy to give it one last try.
"Come on Ashley...last one I promise."
She looked over at me for a minute. I could tell by the look in her eyes that she didn't feel right. It looked like the doctor and nurses didn't give a shit. Inside I was panicking. There was clearly something wrong at this point. I just wanted this over with so they'd at least help her. She mouthed "I love you". I smiled
"I love you too Ash"
She weakly smiled and turned her attention back to this one last push that was taking everything out of her. Finally, with the doctor's help, the baby was here. They held her up for Ashley and took her to give her a little help. I went to see the baby for just a second. I was grinning from ear to ear. I turned back around to Ashley and she was unconscious
"Ashley...ASH..."
It was a split second before a million things started happening at once. I was pushed out of the way as they started CPR. A nurse came over and took my arm and was pulling me out of the room and leading me down the hall to the waiting room. I was freaking out
"Ashley!! What is going on?!!?!"
She didn't say anything she kept hold of my arm as we went through the doors to the waiting room. I ripped my arm away and tried heading back to where Ashley was. The nurse put her hands on my chest and pushed me back
"That is my wife! Someone tell me what is going on!!'
"If you just wait here I'll find out."
I stood there staring at the doors. I finally turned around and everyone was staring at me with looks of concern and fear on their faces. Colby came over and put his hand on my back. I looked over at him and lost it. Ashley was everything to me...my whole world. Everything changed in the blink of an eye. I didn't understand what happened. I knew something was wrong. I should've spoken up. I shouldn't have pushed her so much. We went over to the chairs and sat down. What the hell was taking this nurse so long??? She finally came back and sat next to me
"What's going on?"
"She had placental abruptio and lost a lot of blood. It caused her to go into shock. They were able to get her stable enough for surgery."
"Surgery? Is she going to be alright?"
"I can't answer that. You'll just have to wait. I'm sorry"
She got up and walked away as I sighed. More waiting. I was tired of waiting. I just wanted answers. I just wanted to see her.
"I can't lose her..."
"Don't say that Jon. You just have to wait. She'll be alright"
"You didn't see her..."
I sighed and sat back in the chair. I closed my eyes. I was trying to get that image of her out of my head. I started thinking about my entire life with Ashley...her eyes, her smile, the way her whole face lights up when I walk in the room, her laugh, that goofy dance she does in her chair when she's excited, her hugs, her kiss...
"Why do you cover your eyes like that? They're too pretty to cover up." "So I take it I picked the right place for lunch.""Yep. You're my new best friend." "Ashley...baby I'm so sorry. No matter what anyone has told you about me. No matter what they've said about me. The only words that matter are mine. I know how I feel about you better than anyone. They're not me and they don't know. I love you Ashley. I love you with all of my heart. Please don't die Ashley...I need you." "I love you." "Please don't let go" "Tell me one thing you want to do when we get to Florida and I'll make it happen""I want to see the ocean. I've never been and I've always wanted to."
All of these memories. All of these things that we did and said. I was so scared. We fought so hard to get to where we are. I can't lose her. I don't know what I'd do without her. I couldn't stop thinking about it. FINALLY a doctor walked through the doors and sat down
YOU ARE READING
Wicked Game (Dean Ambrose Fan Fic)
Fanfiction"You couldn't even pick up the phone and tell me?" "No, you didn't deserve to know"
