Love, Blood and Wilderness | YELLOWJACKETS

Chapter 33

TW: violent chapter: blood, beating, etc.
_________________________________
    I cleaned myself up of the mess that I was on the attic floor. After what felt like years of crying on the floor, I straightened myself up and took some deep breaths, wiping the tears from my cheeks.

Everything was so overwhelming and uncertain. I felt incredibly low and heavy with melancholy. But I had spent enough time feeling sorry for myself. Despite Shauna's hurtful words and despite our...

... Her baby being gone, life moved on. I needed to collect myself.

"Get a hold of yourself, Thompson," I muttered to myself, forcing myself to my feet. I clenched my jaw and ran my hands through my hair, exhausted from all of the sobbing I did.

    I shook my head, scrunched my nose and made myself walk back downstairs, no matter how much pain it caused me.

    I trudged back down and Natalie looked up at me with worry. She still hadn't moved from her spot. I was grateful that she hadn't chased after me and made sure I was okay, that she knew I needed time for myself.

    "Are you okay?" She asked again.

    I nodded.

    "You were up there for, like, twenty minutes," she pointed out.

    "I'm fine," I said and noticed that the bedroom door was open. Shauna had left.

"Where's Shauna?!" I demanded, rushing the bedroom and finding the bedsheets unfolded and messy.

"Well, after she burnt Lottie's blanket," Nat explained, and I assumed it was the blanket that Lottie had stitched the symbol into, "she went outside. I watched her go into the meat shed."

Without a doubt, she had gone to connect with Jackie. She needed her best friend more than ever, and there was nothing I wished for more than for Jackie to be here.

But Jackie couldn't handle Shauna's bark and that's what got her killed. I wouldn't make the same mistake. I wouldn't let my love for Shauna Shipman hurt me.

    God, I was just angry. Jackie didn't deserve to be hurt by Shauna either. She made Shauna good, she made Shauna whole.

    "Hey," Nat voiced, softly, "how about we go for a hunt or something to take your mind off of everything? Or we could help look for Crystal?"

I thought about it. Looking for Crystal would be a good distraction. Well, not a good distraction, I hoped she was okay. But still, it was a distraction.

On the other hand, I didn't feel like dragging my already exhausted body through heavy snow and bitter air. My idea of a good distraction right now would be downing a bottle of vodka and drowning out my sorrows.

Instead, called to Van and collected her and Nat.

"C'mon, let's have a game of cards," I told them.

They both wore an excited grin.

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

    Van slapped the table when the jack was distributed.

    "Goddamnit!" Nat exclaimed, smiling.

    "How are you so fucking good at Slapjack?" I laughed and recollected the cards.

    "Taissa's really competitive," Van giggled.

    Van peaked over my shoulder at Gen and Melissa who were chatting and staring out the window.