thirteen

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I laid on my usual side of the bed. And thought about what Ryan tried to do. He jas been in e bathroom foe a long time, i dont why, he just has. I heard the shower go off, I threw the covers on me and pretended to be sleep.

The bathroom door open, I open my eye a little bit and he was naked, I saw his bare butt. My close my eyes shut before he turned around. "I know you're not sleep" Ryan said. I sat up and just stared at the celling. "WHAT THE FREAK" I started. He turned around and we met eyes.

"What are you talking bout?" He asked. "You sending me mixed" I took a deep breathe to stop myself from yelling. "First, you act like I don't even exist when we are at school, then you treat me like nobody when we are around your friends, and then when we get home you tuck me in and make me laugh, tell me what's going on" I said.

He sat on the bed beside me. He didn't say anything for a while. "I like you, I really like you" he said. I frowned my eyebrows in confusing. "What"

"I don't wanna ruin my reputation, but I really like you, so when we are not in public I treat you as if you are my girlfriend" he stated. Making me mad.

"Wow, so you're hiding 'our secret relationship' that doesn't exist?" I asked. He nodded his head slowly. I got out of the bed and grabbed my stuff and walked out the room. "Where are you going?"he asked. I shrugged. "I don't know, anywhere buy here" I said.

I walked out and slammed the front door. I wrapped my arms around myself to keep warm, it was freezing and I only had in a T-shirt and boxers. I started walking down the block and decided to go home, my real home. I was hoping my mama wasn't gonna be there.

I finally reached my house. I pulled the key I still had, out of my purse. I unlock the door, I flipped the light switch on and there was old food, dirty clothes, even dead roaches and live ones all over the place. I felt disguised. I walked down the hall to my room, and my I turned the light on and my mama was layinon my bed, with a half drunken liquor bottle on the floor.

He making was all over her face. And she was half naked, with a bra and the tiniest skirt ever. I shook her. "Ma, mama" she didn't respond. I checked her pulse she was breathing, so I continued to try and wake her.

She finally woke up and looked at me. "Where have you been?" She asked. "Like you care" I mumbled looking at the floor. I think she heard me cause she used her finger to lift my head back up.

"I have been worried sick about you" she said. She pulled me in a hug. she smelled like alcohol, cigarettes and like she tried to freashing up with some vanilla perfume. I gently pushed her off. "What's wrong? baby"she asked. I took a step back. I could feel the tears run down my face. She tried to wipe them away but I slapped her hand.

"What is wrong with you?" I said. Starting to get louder. "You are just letting yourself go, you always kept the house clean, you never smoked or drink, and you NEVER went to clubs, and you defiantly didn't sleep around with people. Why are you doing this?" I asked.

"You, you kept me on my feet, I was this way before I got pregnant with you, and once you was born I got my life together, i wanted to take care of you the way my mother never did. I wanted nothing but the best for you" she said. "Then why are you acting like this noe.' I asked.

"I thought you loved me, the only other person I ever loved besides you and father was tyron, and for you to send him to jail i thought you didn't want me to be happy, so I started drinking, staying out late, just thinking my own daughter don't love me anymore and my soulmate is in jail, because of my daughter" she said.

She started to cry. I didn't ever think of it at way. I didn't know she actually loved him.

"Mama, its not like that, I love you with all my heart and I always want you to be happy" I stopped to wipe my face. I looked at her in wiped her face to. "But he wasn't right for you, he hurts you and me" I said. She nodded. "I know you were trying to help, but i still love him" she said before walking out.

I flopped down on my bed. And dozed off. I woke up to the alarm clock on my phone. And hoped up I had to get ready for school.

I got dress and eat some fruit loops my mama was gone already, it didn't surprise me though. I heard the bud outside. I ran to catch up to it, I got on and sat in my normal seat and waited for shay to get on e bus. When it was her spot she looked at me and sat in the seat behind me.

I turned to face her. ""Hey, why didn't you sit with me?" I asked. "Ask your new friend" she said meanly. "What are you taking snout?" I asked. "Lately, you have been spending time with whoever it is, you barely make time for..."my phone buzzed interrupting her. I looked at it, it was a text from Ryan ask in could we talk. I didn't respond.

"See, when was the last time we did anything together, we barely talk, you always say you're busy." She said. "I'm sorry, I just had a lot of stuff on my mins, like my mom, ry-"I stopped my self before I said Ryan. If I told her i was spendind a lot of Time with him. She would ask why and I couldn't tell her why. Which meant I couldn't tell her that he said he likes me. But I could tell her about Trevor and my mom.

I told her bout my mama. And she rubbed my back and told me it would get better.

The bus stopped and we got off the bus. As we was walking in somebody grabbed my arm. I look and see Ryan with his friends. "What's your problem?" I asked. "You didn't get my text, we need to talk" he said. I snatched my arm away.

"Aren't you embarrassed to talk to me in front of your friends, even in public?" I said. Trying to walk away. But he stopped me. He stood up on a table that was outside. I loomed at him and then shay.

"LISTEN, EVERYBOFY, YOU SEE HER, RIGHT THERE, YEA SOPHIE" he yelled. Everybody started to come outside to see why the most popular guy was standingon a table. I motioned for him to get down, but he acted as if he didn't see me.

"WELL, IM IN LOVE WITH HER, YUP, I AM IN LOVE WITH SOPHIE SMITH, THE GIRL I USED TO GET TO DO MY HOMEWORK I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT HER, HER SMILE, THE WAY SHE DRESS, THE WAY SHE CAN MAKE PEOPLE LAUGH EVEN IF YOU'RE CRYING. "he said. I let out a little chuckle while a few tears rolled down my face. They were tears of happiness, he ruined his reputation for me, just to tall me how he feel.

I was fit to get on the table with him, but my eyes wondered off and met Trevor's. He stared at me for a while then walked back in the school angrily. I ran in after him, trying to catch up.but I stopped in the hallway and looked out the window and looked at Ryan who was looking to see where i have gone and I then looked at Trevor as he was walking away. And I saw shay looking around just like everybody else searching for me."

I thought for a while, who should I pick, then it hit me. I k
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