nine.

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It's been 3 months.

3 months since i've seen any of the boys and been on tour with them. But tonight was a special occasion, one I couldn't miss for the world.

Tonight the boys were performing at Royal Albert Hall in London. Their 5th studio album released tomorrow and they were performing it in concert tonight with a full orchestra. This was monumental.

Originally, I wasn't going to come, but then I saw promo for it again and somehow convinced Mack to buy plane tickets with me to London. And, here we are.

"How sure are you that we're going to get in?" she questioned as we approached the venue.

I chuckled, "I mean, I bought tickets." Waving my phone around, "But i'm also hoping that whoever is guarding backstage will recognize me and let us back."

"You mean no one knows we're here?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise! Well, that and I didn't wanna let anyone down if I chickened out."

"That's fair."

We continued walking toward the venue, getting caught up in the crowd. This was a big event, there were tons and tons of people here, so i'm just glad crowds don't overwhelm me.

Mack reached for my hand, unlike me, crowds did overwhelm her. Luckily, it only took us about 10 minutes to get into the venue and I quickly made my way over to where I thought the entrance to backstage would be. Knowing the boys, they usually have very specific security guards standing there, ones that knew who was who just in case someone forgot their pass.

So, i'm hoping that they'd done the same for tonight. I can't imagine Crystal not being here. I knew Sierra would be because she's got a song on the album with the boys and I believe she's going to perform it with Luke tonight. And I even bet Kinsley was going to be here too.

Over the past few months i've seen the way her and Calum post about each other on instagram and it irks me that I can't find anything wrong with her. Being upset with Kinsley would be so much easier if she was a terrible person, but she's not. From what i've seen, she's an absolute angel.

Sierra and Crystal have even posted pictures with her. I can't blame them, she's always around and I separated myself again. It was bound to happen.

They didn't replace me, though. I knew that. The two girls would still text me nearly every day, updating me on their lives and telling me how much they missed me. Ashton did the same. Luke and Michael, however, would only message me once or twice a week, which wasn't an issue. At least they still thought of me.

Calum? Well, he's cut me off completely. Yet again. I'm not sure what I did to deserve this treatment, and my heart still hurts a little every time I think about it.

Tonight is the night to celebrate my boys and all of the things they've accomplished. Tonight was big.

"Sullivan Fisher, is that you?"

The voice cut through my thoughts, and once my eyes found who it was that said my name, a smile broke out on my face. It was Xavier, my favorite of their security guards.

I squealed, running over to hug the man. I'm pretty sure he was in his 40s, but he's been with the boys since 2015 and I don't think he's going anywhere. He's probably the nicest man known to earth.

"In the flesh!" I smiled brightly when I stepped back from the hug.

He looked behind me, "Is that little Mack?" I think the last time he saw Mack was when she was 17 and here she was at 22.

Mack nodded, walking over to hug Xavier. Even though she hadn't seen him in years, i'm sure she remembered just how great he was.

"Boys know you're coming?" Xavier questioned.

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