To Let it All go Down in Flames - jegulus/starchaser

A Flower and a Smile (sirius pov)

Then I thought back to the party, how Remus tried seeking out, but I fallowed just as I used to do when we were at a birthday party or a quidditch match. He was angry then two yelling at me, but all his words blurred together at the time. I told him I was sorry but that only made things worse, I meant it, I really meant it, but he didn't want to hear it, he really didn't want to hear it. Though he did not punch me, that time he was fuming.

And then after he spoke his mind, I said in a tone meant to be funny "We never were good at talking normally, were we?" at that he froze something slipping from his eye reveling some kind of fondness I had not seem in almost a year now. How had it only been a year? Remus walked back to the party after that, but I walked around the castle for a while. I briefly saw James and my brother laughing as they dashed through an empty stretch of hall, I smiled at the sight.

I knew something happened to my brother over the summer, but I didn't ask. I wanted to and didn't at the same time, I was scared to break the shield our little group built, I was scared of what I would hear. I didn't want anything to change I only wanted it to go back. Like to second year, that was a good year me and reg were on okay terms (not at our worst but not our best) the marauders were whole we were beginning to work on the animagi thing and the map. It was a good year, clean, fresh. I miss being twelve, things were simple then.

I had no idea how complicated things were soon to get.

Professor sprot cleared her throat standing at the front of the class we drifted into a silence, and she smiled "hello class" she started "welcome to honors herbology you all pulled high enough on you OWL scores, but that doesn't mean you get to relax you have your NEWTS to worry about next year."

There was a collective groan acrost the class as she said this, but I scoffed, they all acted like NEWTS and OWLS will mater when we're fighting agents' death eaters on the battlefield. I looked over to James who yawned.

"Now," she yelled over all of us "I will start listening off your partners, you will be dissecting with these people, to essays, study, reports everything you will need in the real world." I scoffed again "alright let's start from the top miss. Abbot with Miss. Mcdonald." Mary let out a sigh sitting next to the Hufflepuff.

James got paired with Lilly, Marline with some Hufflepuff, and finally after what could have been 3 days "Mr. Black and Mr. Lupin." I could feel my heart rate pick up as Remus sighed but he put up no protest. That had to be a good sign, right? I felt like I could scream, I was so happy though Remus looked like he wanted to die. We chose a table in the back of the room that lay on it a small branch of an alihotsy tree.

We were given the project serval munities later we were to dissect the plant and draw then label it. Remus made the first precise cut as I drew on the parchment what I saw, it was one assignment per pair, you had to work together. We communicated threw awkward side glances and quick looking away for most of class as everyone else chatted away happily that was until I took a sharp look over at Remus who snaped putting down the knife with a thud "What?!"

"Oh, just admiring your everlasting beauty." I don't know what made me say it, but my heart stopped beating in my chest, Remus flushed tuning back to the plant not saying another word, but now when we made those awkward glances we would look away as sharply we would just hold the others gaze for a moment and then turn back to the project.

Across the classroom Lilly and James were talking away happily, Lilly had a scalpel in her hand and she spit the plant down the middle, James recoiled in discuses, but she only laughed showing him the slime on the tip of her knife. He rolled his eyes with a smirk pushing the knife back over to her as she laughed as well. They had come so far James used to swoon at even the mention of Lilly's name, Lilly used to want to burn the groaned that James even looked at. Now they teased each other over plant guts. They were so natural and easy, they acted so east around to each other, but not in a romantic way, though I wouldn't doubt in another life James could have won Lilly over and they would live quietly with a classic happily ever after. But that was not this life.

I looked back to Remus who caught my eye and a small blush crept up on his cheeks as he looked away annoyed.

A plan formed and I looked back to James and Lilly and how well they did around each other, after what James did all those years. He won her over, it may not have been in the romantic sense, but he did, it worked. Maybe, just maybe it could work for me and Moony. I smiled as class ended and we turned in our plants and diagrams, a week later me and Moony got 100% on it.

The next day Remus was sitting alone at breakfast and just then I remembered the one-time James went over to Lilly during breakfast smiling like an idiot, that was the furthest James had ever gotten to a full conversation with Lilly. Sure, it ended with him getting a face full of pumpkin juice, but they talked for a minute after that.

I sat in the attempt seat next to Remus saying nothing, he just staired back grimacing. "What are you doing?" he asked a harshness to his tone.

"How do you expect me to stay away from your utter beauty baby."

"Do not call me that."

I cocked my head showing off a cheeky grin "oh, why not love?"

"Sirius." he warned.

"You look good in this light you know."

He face grew in annoyance "Sirius"

"I mean you look great no matter the lighting but today is special."

"SIRIUS."

The great hall went silent a rare sight as they all looked over to me and Remus. Moony's face went red as he mutters grabbing his bag "stay away from me." I smirked as I responded "but your beauty is so magnetic dear." he huffed again as he walked out of view. I counted it as a win, we talked and I didn't have pumpkin juice in my hair nor did I get punched, so better than I expected. And I swear there was a slight smile before he walked away.

The fallowing week as classes carried on and James and Lilly disappearing more and more often, but I chose to leave to it be. That week Remus also allowed the marauders back at full moons, I could feel we were getting close I knew it I could practically taste it. He was letting down his guard as he sat with Lilly, James, Marline, Pater and I in the common room though Mary still hadn't come around.

James scheduled his quidditch try outs disappointed by the fact I still couldn't play. But very time James got stressed now (even though pre-prank James never got stressed out) he would just disappear making some excuse as to why he left the room. Lilly did a slimier thing sometimes just after James, like they were meeting up together.

They weren't dating, were they? No James would be bragging about it constantly and James has stopped all those big romantic gestures but maybe just maybe. I mean I was thinking of that old James not this new one. Maybe he did win her over. Maybe.

Another time a week after that I found Remus studying in the library alone after class, I had picked up a few things a day prior weighting until he was alone. I smiled to myself grabbing the bag from under my bed. I ran down the hallway briefly getting stopped my Filtch. Remus sat in the corner only two tables away from where my brother always seemed to sit, sometimes with James or his other friends. I walked over to behind a bookshelf looking through admiring his messy hair, or the clarity of his reading glasses, even the ink of his cheek. He flipped a page in his book before looking to another if I had to guess he was fact checking something. He had on one of his oversized sweaters his nails were painted to matching the streaks in his hair.

I came over to him an iris (his favorite flower) in hand, along with a bar of chocolate. I knew how to win over my moony. When he looked up, he did not smile, he did not say hello as I sat next to him, he only looked up for a moment grimacing then looking back down as if I was nothing. "Hello moonykins."

"Sirius."

"I come baring gifts."

"I can see that." for a second, I sewar there was a faint trace of a smile on his face or maybe it was a scowl, either way he took the cholate and sniffed the flower before lighting it on fire. So, I am counting it as a win. Things like this went on for weeks and weeks, and I swear he was lightning up. He would smile for a moment before telling me he hates me, he would try not to laugh before leaving, he would look at me without hate. I swear it was working, I do.

James on the other hand disagreed he figured out what I was doing less than a week after it started. He tried to tell me it was a bad idea, but I could find it to care because it was working. It was. It had to be.