One last Chance

worst decision

*Evelyn*

Charles had won the race, but it felt weird. Because as much as I liked that he had really fought on the track, some of his maneuvers had been over the top. Especially towards Lance, he had kind of gone into every maneuver with sharpened knives. It had really worried me. But I wouldn't bring it up.

We hadn't talked after this morning and I didn't know what it was, but the way he had looked at me before the race, the fact that he hadn't come to me, triggered something in me.

I was still standing with his people in the parc fermé when he drove there and got out of his car. He cheered and then jumped in our direction. He hugged his people. His mechanics, his engineers.

Xavi pulled me forward a bit and immediately it got kind of weird.

I had seen that Charles had noticed me, if only for the hint of a second. He had immediately turned away and was now talking to Matia.

"He didn't see you!" laughed Xavi, seeming to really believe his words. I knew it was different.

I knew he didn't want to see me "It's okay. I'll see him later.", my voice sounded much more relaxed than I felt right now.

Something was breaking inside of me and I knew we were on the brink again. A constant back and forth and in the end we ended up back at the point where we would break up. Only this time it wouldn't catch me as off guard as last time.

I knew he wasn't feeling well, that he wasn't happy. I could see it in his gaze.

Why did it have to be so endlessly complicated between us?

After all, I loved him and I was sure he loved me back, so why couldn't we just finally be happy?

"Can you tell him I'm waiting for him in his driver's compartment? I don't feel so good.", I mumbled, Xavi nodded but then looked at me with a worried sideways glance.

"Do you want someone to accompany you?", he now turned his full attention to me.

"No, it's fine. Enjoy the podium. You guys deserve it. I'll make it back to the pits in one piece.", I forced myself to smile, then pushed my way through the crowd back away from the podium.

I didn't want to take away Charles' joy in his victory. I didn't want to be the one why he couldn't rejoice.

I just wanted him to be happy.

But why couldn't he be happy with me?

I felt tears immediately spring to my eyes. It was a fact that I could hardly cope with, because it hurt immensely to know that our next conversation would probably be another breakup.

Only this time everything would be much more complicated.

We had Aly and I was pregnant. So this time we wouldn't be able to separate just like that. Or would we?

Could we just break up and never speak to each other again? What if I just took the kids with me?

Maybe just giving him a break for a while would be enough. If he could just be by himself for a while.

Maybe the last few weeks had just crushed him and we had gotten on his nerves. Maybe I should just take Aly with me and we would stay near Seb and Hannah for a while until Charles could breathe again and not feel forced to be with us. Didn't feel trapped.

Maybe if I gave him a little time and space, I could save us.

I hoped so much, because I would have a hard time coping with another breakup, even if I had to do it much faster this time than last time. It would still be incredibly hard for me.