Closeted | Boy x Boy

~Nuen~

"I still don't see why she's here," grumbled Jay, flicking a cookie crumb off of the table and onto the floor. 

I glanced at Jay. I was sitting on my kitchen counter, Marley resting her head in my lap as she sucked on a popsicle. She'd brought me cookies from Subway, one of my favorite treats, after I had practically cried to her to come over and save me from Jay. That was before the whole trying to kiss me, begging for my forgiveness, all of that bullshit, and honestly I couldn't be happier to have her here to break the tension.

Jay was working on the first poem. It was a really short one, and one of my favorite lines was about how minds were like parachutes, they didn't work unless they were open. Jay was writing how he felt about it on a piece of lined notebook paper while subconsciously clenching the pencil so tightly it was about ready to snap in his tightened grip. If I was stupid, I'd say it was jealousy, but I'd already established that Jay was just teasing me. Besides, he'd apologized, so it was probably best to forget about it. But I couldn't. Not to mention I could still feel his lips on my neck, and it made me shiver everytime I remembered the ticklish feeling. Goosebumps spread up and down my arms.

Marley sucked loudly on her popsicle, swinging one leg over the edge of the counter. I glanced at her. "If you get any of your fluids on my clothes, like popsicle juice or spit, I'm going to strangle you," I warned her, turning off my phone and setting it down beside me.

"I brought you cookies, you can deal with a bit of spit." She gargled it in her mouth.

I swatted her forehead. "Don't you dare." 

She laughed out loud, turning her head so that she didn't choke on her own spit and laughter. I heard Jay hiss through his teeth, and looked up, but he didn't meet my gaze. It was kind of wierd, the difference between how nice he was around me to how grumpy he got whenever Marley was in the room. I couldn't figure out why on earth Jay didn't like her. Even if he was jealous, Marley was gay, and I didn't like boys, so Jay didn't have a chance with me and I didn't have a chance with Marley. Simple. But I stared down at my shoes, and felt a warm flush spread from my toes to my cheeks as I thought about how it felt having his soft lips against my warm skin. 

I flushed and ducked my head, praying Jay didn't see me blushing and assume I was thinking about him. I wasn't gay. I was just confused, that was all. It was a new feeling, and I liked the feeling, but I'd like it just as much and probably more if it had been a girl kissing my neck. I just hadn't had one kiss me yet, only Jay. And even though Jay was extremely attractive, hot, attractive, sexy, hot, and really, really muscular and sweaty and hot and I was probably the luckiest person in the world for being kissed by him, but I didn't want his attention... Or- No, no, I told myself. I don't want his attention. Definitely not.

"So, how does all that pussy taste, Jay? You're practically drowning in it. Must be nice," Marley mused, tossing her popsicle stick up into the air and caught it.

Jay blinked. "What?"

"You know? Your fangirls? The stalkers? The obsessive ones? Seriously. I wish they looked at me like that."

Jay frowned, blowing a strand of white hair out of his face. "Uhm... I haven't really noticed. I guess they're a little annoying, but sometimes I don't realize when people like me. It's especially hard with girls. I just don't really understand them, you know? Never really have. It's complicated," he mumbled, scribbling out some of the words he had written on the paper.

I craned my head, nibbling at my cookie to try and see what he was writing. "What are you crossing out?" I questioned.

Jay shrugged. "I dunno. I don't like how it sounds. It just sounds stupid when I reread what I wrote, so I'm re-doing it."

Marley sighed dramatically. "Abey, when can you find me a girlfriend?"

I rolled my eyes. "I made that promise like six years ago. If it hasn't happened yet, I don't think it's going to." I pouted, feigning a hurt expression. "I thought I was your girlfriend?"

Jay's brows furrowed and his eye twitched. The pencil snapped in half with a loud crack, startling Marley in me. Marley settled back down into my laugh. "You're too... girly, to be my girlfriend. I want a hot, biker lesbian that kicks ass and eats the asses she kicked for breakfast. I want her to eat my ass. You know?"

I wrinkled my nose. "Not really." I frowned. "Hey, what do you mean I'm girly?! I can be a totally masculine lesbian!" I cried, kicking my foot against the cupboard. "I can kick ass, I can be a biker!"

Jay laughed.

I glared at him. "What?!"

"It's just funny, the way you want to prove everybody wrong. Sunshine you can't be a lesbian, but you're still going to claim you can be." He glanced at Marley. "Does he do this often?"

"Only every day of his existence," Marley scoffed.

I shoved her off of me and hopped angrily off the counter. "You both are assholes. Let me live my life."

Jay smiled and pushed the chair out from underneath the table, gesturing for me to sit in it. I did as he asked, and leaned over to try and see what he was writing on his notebook paper. He slid the sheet away from me, blushing slightly. I frowned. "Hey, this is our project, remember? I want to see what you're putting down!" I whined.

Jay shrugged. "You will. Eventually."

Marley chuckled on the counter.