After All This Time// Sebastian Sallow x Reader Hogwarts Legacy Fanfiction

Chapter 56

The next few weeks were pretty uneventful, but that didn't mean that I wasn't still full of anxiety.

Mrs. Weasley assured Sebastian and I that the proper people were pursuing Charles, but just hearing that wasn't good enough. She refused to give us detailed updates on the matter and insisted that we focus solely on our studies for the time being. I tried- I really did, but the thought of what that man could be capable of was constantly gnawing at the back of my brain.

The nightmares worsened.

Most of them with the theme of watching others get hurt because of me, and Charles being at the epicenter of all the caused mishaps. Sebastian was there for me, though. He didn't mind me sneaking into his dorm late at night to wake him. He would sit with me in the common room, or sometimes we'd go to the Undercroft. We never really did a lot of talking during these times, as I just couldn't bring myself to retell the happenings of the dreams. 

I'd pretty much decided that sleeping wasn't worth it, unless I really needed it or couldn't help falling asleep. I occasionally used the medication to get some uninterrupted sleep, but I didn't like taking it too often because of quidditch. I needed to be on my best game, and the sleep medication almost made me feel weaker and more tired than if I'd just stayed up and not slept in the first place. 

Sebastian and I were sitting in the library, both reading separate books. He had a hand on my leg and would gently squeeze my thigh when my leg started shaking and my foot was tapping. I was just feeling antsy all the time now. It killed me, not being able to do anything. 

We were forbidden from leaving the school grounds, and weren't even allowed to go to Hogsmeade due to the last kidnapping. We were threatened with expulsion if we were to leave the grounds. Weekends were all boring and blurry now, and I'd taken up partying as a pretty common pastime. Where there was booze and drugs, I was there. 

"You okay?" Sebastian whispered against my ear, leaning over into my space. "You seem extra bouncy today."

"Nothing above my ordinary levels of anxiety," I sighed. 

The thoughts were there, all the time. There was little to no stopping them. 

"We can go get some air if you'd like," he offered. 

"Sure," I said. 

We closed our books and put them back in their homes on the shelf and headed out of the library. Sebastian took my hand as we walked through the halls toward the astronomy tower. Once we reached the top, we sat down, and I let my feet hang off the edge. There were a few other students up in the tower as well, but they kept to themselves, as did we. 

I leaned my head on Sebastian's shoulder and he started to run his fingers through my hair. I let out a breath and focused on the landscapes below us. It was quiet and peaceful except for the light chatter from the other students present. I tried really hard to just clear my mind and not think about things. 

I always felt that no matter how strong I am, I've never been able to stop people from hurting the ones I love. I almost can't handle thinking about it. I try and try to stop things from happening, but it feels like no matter how much effort I put in, the people around me are always in danger. 

Mrs. Weasley told me that I needed to start trusting that people could take care of themselves and that the right people were working on stopping everything right now. But I just can't shake the feeling that if I'm not actively trying to stop the bad things from happening, they'll just keep happening. 

"You're doing it again," said Sebastian, pulling my face to look at him. I stared into his eyes, which were full of worry. 

"I'm sorry," I said. 

"Don't be sorry," he told me. "I just don't like to see you worrying so much. I wish there was some way I could help."

"Honestly, just your presence is always help enough," I said. "You do help calm me to some degree. I hate being apart from you."

"Well that's good that you like having me around, because I'm definitely not planning on going anywhere," he smiled. 

After it started to get too cold, we headed back inside. Sebastian held me close as we walked back to the common room. 

For a while, we just cuddled on the couch by the fireplace, and I buried my face in his chest, trying not to think too hard about anything. To a great extent, being around Sebastian did help calm my mind. I loved the way his hands and arms felt as they wrapped around my body, encasing me in his scent and touch. His soft smiles always made my heart melt from the inside out. It wasn't long before I fell asleep against Sebastian as I listened to his heart beating inside his chest. 

Surprisingly enough, my sleep was sound and free of any weird dreams. It was honestly the first real sleep I'd had in a few weeks, and I was immensely grateful for it, and thankful to Sebastian, who'd let me sleep on him in the first place. Sebastian was comfortable and felt like all things related to safety and home. He was warm and loving, and had entirely consumed me, mind, body and soul at this point. 

Once it was later in the evening, we headed to our respective dorms, and I shed my robes, dropping them to the floor. I stretched my arms out and walked over to my bed, and noticed a peculiar looking letter sitting right on my pillow. 

I didn't recognize the handwriting on the letter. My name was spelled out in large beautiful letters in a dark plum colored ink. Hesitantly, I picked up the envelope and broke open the seal. What I saw completely destroyed any peace that I'd procured over spending the last few hours with Sebastian.