Heartstopper oneshots/ requests

Meeting the Paris Squad

Sooo this is set in a mixed school, so they're all together.

Tw: panic attack, eating disorder mention and Of Mice and Men spoilers looool

I watched the group every lunchtime, it was like clockwork. I would get to the canteen two minutes before them. My bag would be on the table next to me, my can of drink in one hand and my phone in the other.

The table I sat at meant that I had the perfect view of the table the friend group sat at. It wasn't like I actively tried to stalk them, it's just that our routines lined up. It had been this way for almost a year now and Charlie would sometimes catch my eye and give me a small wave. We had never spoken to each other before, he was the year above me.

As I watched them all sit down today though I noticed that Charlie barely looked up from the table. His eyes seemed fixed on his uneaten lunch and his face was dull. It seems strange to admit that there was an ache in my chest when I saw him. I didn't even know him and yet I felt sorry for him because he looked sad. Like something was really bothering him.

The rest of the group were sat around him; laughing and joking, completely unaware of how quiet he was. My own friends; Lucy and Charlotte were sitting either side of me, talking to each other over me. Yet I sat still, my eyes fixated on the boy I barely knew who looked sad. There was just something about him, he seemed like such a good person and to see him looking so sad just didn't sit right with me.

I watched as he slowly got up from his seat and excused himself from the table.

"I'm gonna go to the bathroom, you guys carry on to the field" I said, immediately standing up, "I'll see you out there in a sec"

Without really knowing what I was doing, I began to follow Charlie through the corridor. At first I thought he must be going to meet with someone. But as we got further and further away from the rest of the school on lunch, I realised that couldn't be the case.

I continued to follow him from a distance, watching as he picked up his pace and began trying doors to classrooms. Only to find each one he tried to be locked. We were down the English corridor now; you couldn't hear anyone else from here. Charlie hadn't noticed me, but I had noticed how panicked he seemed. Like he really needed to get into one of the classrooms.

"Hey" I finally spoke, my voice echoed through the empty corridor and Charlie spun around.
His face softened slightly when he saw me, "H-hi" He stammered out, his forced smile looking more like a grimace.
"Are you okay?" I asked, my voice full of uncertainty and yet sincere concern
"Uh- yeah I was just-" He hesitated and I noticed how his breath quickened as if he was still rushing around, but he was stood still.

"I uh-" He tried to speak again, only this time he fell to the floor, sliding down the wall of the corridor like his knees couldn't take his weight anymore.
"Hey!" I rushed over and sat down on the floor next to him
"I-I'm sorry I just-" Charlie was gasping for breath now and I knew this all too well
"You don't have to speak, okay? Just stay here for a bit" I told him calmly, but I don't know if he was listening.

I watched as Charlie kept wringing his fingers until they were red, I saw as he put his head in his hands as he tried to make sense of what was going on. The way he rocked slightly as he sat on the floor.

"You're okay" I say carefully, "You're having a panic attack, I have them sometimes-"
"I feel like-like I'm dying!" He jolted his head to the side to look at me, "I- I feel like I can't-" As we looked at each other for a second time I could see the fear in his eyes. Like he really did believe he was dying.

"Hey, it's okay. Look" I pulled his hands into mine to stop him from squeezing them too hard. We both faced each other, sitting cross legged in the corridor.
"You're safe, everything's okay. You just need to breathe okay?" I started doing exaggerated deep breaths and after a few seconds Charlie copied me.

At first he couldn't do it properly, he kept taking breathe in and then quickly exhaling again in fear of suffocating. But, slowly, he began to do it.

"There, you see" I smiled slightly as he began to breathe normally again, "You were having a panic attack" I explained what they were and that I sometimes get them too.

"I never used to get them" Charlie started, he was sitting back against the wall now. His knees drawn up and his arms resting on them. It was almost like nothing had happened.

"Yeah, they come and go" I said casually
"You're the one I see every lunch, aren't you?"
"Yeah" I laugh slightly, "I'm not stalking you, I swear"
Charlie laughs, "You should come and sit with us"
"Oh, no I couldn't-" I start to protest, but Charlie cuts me off
"Your friends can come too" He said, referring to Lucy and Charlotte

Lucy and Charlotte weren't really my friends. Most of the time the two of them just spoke to each other and I was just there. Usually watching Charlie's table. Come to think of it, I didn't have anyone here I would call a friend. Is that weird?

Charlie's phone started ringing, ripping me from my thoughts.

"I better get back to the table" He said looking down at his phone, I couldn't help but look to see who was ringing - Nick.
"Are you two dating?"

The words slipped out of my mouth before I could stop them. The curiosity getting the better of me. I had spent the last year watching the two of them at the lunch table; the subtle knowing looks they'd give each other, the flirting, the shared smiles. It was so cute to watch, but it was like no one else noticed. Their friends didn't seem to notice, or they chose to be oblivious.

"Yeah, but we haven't really told anyone"
I shrugged, "You don't need to - I shouldn't have asked, I just see the way you two look at each other"
Charlie smiled at that.
"Do the people you sit with know?"
"Yeah, well most of them - right, come on, we can't sit on the floor all day"
"Lunch is nearly over anyway, people will be stampeding down here in a minute"
Charlie laughed as we both got up, "The English corridor always seems the worst doesn't it - none of the other corridors are as bad"
"People just can't wait to get into lesson and learn about Shakespeare or how George shot Lenny"
"D'know that was written on the very front page of the book in my English? Ruined the whole thing"
"The greatest spoiler of our English Literature career"
Charlie laughed again, it felt good to make someone laugh.

"Do you read outside of school?" Charlie asks as we make our way back to the atrium. The noise of the school still on lunch was starting to fade back in.
"Sometimes - I haven't found a good book in a while though"
"What do you like reading?"

We continued talking about books right up to the doors of the canteen. It was nice to actually have a conversation with someone and for it to end with a book recommendation. Maybe I didn't talk to Lucy and Charlotte as much as I thought. Maybe they weren't missing me at all right now. They hadn't called me like Nick had called Charlie.

"Do you want to sit with us? There's only five minutes left?" Charlie looked at me and then into the busy canteen.
"Okay, thanks"

We walked over to Charlie's usual table and everyone turned to look at us. It felt weird being in this part of the room. I was so used to watching this table, not being a part of it.

"This is- wait, I don't even know your name!"
"Gabby" I smiled at them all awkwardly
"Hi Gabby" A bleach blond-haired girl grinned, waving at me, "Come sit here!"

I happily accepted her invitation and we seemed to hit it off straight way. Mid conversation with who I now know is Darcy, I glance over to Charlie who's deep in conversation with Nick. Maybe he's telling him about what happened?

It felt like only a minute had gone by before the bell was ringing. Telling us lunch was over.

"Are you joining us tomorrow?" Darcy looked at me hopefully, "Please say yes, I'm getting bored of Tara"
"Hey!" A girl, who must be Tara, called over to us from across the table.
"Why do you think I've sat so far away from you?" Darcy shot back and I just laughed at the pair of them. Did they know they were flirting?

The strange thing was, I felt happy here. A lot happier than I did sitting where I usually did. Maybe this could be better.

"It's okay, Darcy - I'll come back tomorrow"
Darcy cheered dramatically and threw her arms around me, "Thank you, thank you, thank you!"

I properly laughed this time. Sitting with this lot could be fun.

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