I'm waiting
For WHAT you may ask?
Why is my face turning blue as I gasp
For a breath
Or a chance
Or some meaning to this song and dance
We've been here before
The game took to long
And I couldn't bare to hear this dreadful song
My heart skips a beat
And my stomach sinks within me
One shrilling silent scream escapes
Oh no there goes my feet
Immobilized
Hardly sterilized from the world that keeps infecting my insides.
Here we go again
The ringing in my head is familiar but no so sweet
I can't overcome everything that's thrown at me
Oh no I can't breathe
Do you know the feeling
Of rapid butterflies with rabies in your chest?
Digging a hole to bury the stress
Gnawing at your heart until there's nothing left?
Perhaps the night before a big game
Or the night before she changed her last name
The night before you were no longer a family of 2
Or when your first born finally learns to chew
Or maybe those are mudane
And I'm no longer sane
Because to compare this pain
is about as efficient as putting a bullet in my own brain
And I will
But promise it won't be in vain
