Unwritten Draft

TUYA ; HINDI NAKAHANAY

"I still love you, but goodbye."

I thought that this love would be a happy one, but it turned into one of the most tragic stories you would ever read. I fell in love with you. Deeply in love with you.

But you fell to someone else. It was a domino effect. But what else can I do if that was my fate?

To fall to someone, I couldn't definitely call as my own. To love someone else who saw everything but not me.

I'm little bit sad and extremely broken every time I think of you – of "us".

The story of us that has never started. Our "us" that breaks my heart little by little.

You left a hole in my heart that no one could heal except you – only you.

Those memories of ups and downs that haunt me every little time, I reminisce them.

You are an expert – expert in the game called love. You played very well, that includes me.

I once again enter that game despite the fact that I know from the very start I will be defeated.

So now, I lose. I'm wondering where did I go wrong. What else should I do to win that place in your heart?

The burden, the agony, the complete sadness that wrecked my wholeness.

I dreamed of you every time, but I know you never did the same.

But still, I admire every fiber of you. Every morning, every night, every seconds and minutes that pass by – I think of you.

You. That stuck in my head.

I tried to forget every moment we had, but I can't.

The image of you had been pasted in my memory and it cannot be removed – it will never be.

But this time, I'm letting you free, even if you did not become mine.

I'm also letting myself be autonomous from the cage of my overthinking,

to my "what-ifs",

and of my delusions knowing that it won't happen – even in my wildest dream.

Just always remember that I still love you,

but for now. I want to say my "goodbye".