61. i hate confrontations

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    sakamoto washed his face at the toilet sink

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sakamoto washed his face at the toilet sink. he didn't feel sad. he didn't feel disappointed. he just didn't feel anything. he couldn't feel anything. perhaps he needed more time for reality to sink in.

he dragged his feet out the toilet, only to meet the one person he didn't wish to see.

" sakamoto, " haru silently breathed out.

god he wished he never left the toilet stall. he felt too humiliated to even see haru in the eye.

" haru. "

" how do you feel? you okay? " haru asked as he stepped closer to him.

" i don't know. i just feel like shit, " sakamoto replied, " maybe i should quit volleyball. maybe my parents were right. "

" what?! no, come here, " haru disagreed as he dragged sakamoto by the sleeve. he made him sit down on a long bench next to him. " it's one match. "

" yeah but this is an official match that i screwed up. if it weren't for me, we could've progressed and i even confidently called for the ball and i- "

" i know that there were many things that you could've done but didn't do but is there any point in regretting? it's already over. you can't change what happened with any amount of regret. so use that energy to get stronger. take this as a learning curve. learn from your mistakes. that's how you get better. and in opinion, calling for the ball was not a mistake. even if it was, it would've been an honest one. you've been playing volleyball for years and can't digest that it's not a sport you can play alone, " haru lectured.

sakamoto widened his eyes. this was the first time he heard haru speak so much. " no, i don't think you understand how i feel- "

" you think i don't know how you feel? are you forgetting something? " now haru was just a teeny tiny bit offended.

" oh... yeah... right. you play competitive chess. urgh sorry! i'm forgetting everything because i'm a bad person. i'm bad at everything! "

haru bent down before sakamoto and cautiously touched his red hair. " hey... no. don't say that. you're a good person and a fantastic player... but sometimes things don't turn out the way we want it to turn out but you know what? if you keep chasing for something, the universe would have no choice but to give it to you. "

sakamoto was slightly surprised at the hand on his head but haru's words shook him abit more. no one has ever comforted him like this before. since, no one really supported his decision to play volleyball. his parents weren't even here for his big match. " hey, you're actually quite wise for your age. "

" you're only a year older, " haru deadpanned as he stood up, seeing that sakamoto's mood improved.

sakamoto stood up, " you can call me yukio. i think we're good enough friends for that. "

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