Infinite Chances

His Overpowering Presence

Anak lang talaga ng tipaklong to o! How can I possibly escape this kind of mess that I'm in right now? Ang layo ko na nga, nagkita pa talaga kami. Is fate playing jokes on me now? Kasi kung laro 'to, ako na mismo ang tatapos. Kaya ko naman siyang harapin e. I am so over him and I have worked hard to pick up the tiny pieces for me to be able to fix myself again. I made a big leap of faith. I am stronger than I was before and this mere co-incidence will not break the walls i built for so long. I have protected myself and this small distraction from the person who hurt me before will not destroy a bit of me.

Ang hindi ko lang makayang controlin ay ang mga instances na bigla siyang papapel na makikita ng ibang tao. As I have said over and over again, I don't want people to ask, think and most of all know anything there was between us. Ang tagal kong binuo ang imahe ko dito sa opisina para lang masira na naman ng taong sinira na noon ang lahat sa akin.

Wala siya o kahit na sino man ang may karapatang magsabi na naging bato na'ko dahil hindi nila alam kung ano ang pinagdaanan ko sa kamay ng lalaking 'to. He might look like an angel, but I swear ginawa niyang empiyerno ang buhay ko noon. Hindi ako bitter dahil lahat ng sinasabi ko ay totoo. Isa siyang demonyong nagkatawang tao. Mukha man siyang hindi makabasag pinggan, pero tao naman ang sinisira niya. Binabasag niya, pinaglalaruan at basta-basta niya na lang iiwan sa isang tabi. Hindi siya marunong magpahalaga ng mga taong minamahal siya. Sarili niya lang ang mahal niya.

Pero ano pa ba ang pwede kong gawin noon? I had no way to win over his selfishness. I can never deny the fact that he loved himself more than he loved me. Or should i say, he NEVER did love me. Kasi kung talagang minahal niya ko, hindi niya sana ako pinaglaruan ng ganun. Hindi niya sana winasak ang pagkatao ko noon. Minahal ko siya ng higit pa sa sarili kong buhay pero lahat ng iyon, sinayang niya. Binalewala niya LAHAT.

So, this is it! The game starts NOW. I can do this. I can fight his overpowering presence with my coldness. I will never again show any emotions and I will never give him the chance to overpower me. Sumusobra na talaga siya para isipin na pwede pa kaming bumalik sa dati. Tanga siya para maniwala na babalik ako sa pagiging dating ako. This is me, Samantha Nicole Qua, version 2.0! I will be able to face him no matter what and I will not let myself fall for his traps again. I am SMARTER, BRAVER, AND STRONGER!

Knock, knock...

"Super Sam, here are your coffees. Sir Jake, here's yours too." -Zeffiah. My secretary had the perfect timing. She went in with our coffees and it became my way of re-aligning my nerves.

"Thanks, Zeffiah. And i have the quickest question. Please do come here a sec." -me. I looked out from my kitchen door and called her to come near me.

"What is it, Super Sam?" -Zeffiah.

"How is the food preparation for the meeting later? Are they ready?" -me.

"I was thinking you'd ask me that, Super Sam, so I already checked with the caterers. And yes, they're already settled at the connecting room right next to the conference room that you, guys, are gonna use later." -Zeffiah.

"That's great, Zeffiah. Super thanks." -me. I gave her my sincerest smile and made a thumbs up.

"Anything for you, Super Sam. If that's all, I'll just be outside." -Zeffiah.

"Thanks again, Z." -me.

"Jackey and Gabriel, breakfast is served. Please help yourselves." -me. I walked up to them and served them their breakfast. And Oh God! The look on Jacob's face is mind-wrecking! I know for a fact that he'll ask me about what he saw when he came in. I just hope the questions would come later than sooner. I don't have the best answer yet. I haven't even formulated a lame excuse. But I'll figure something out. Later, maybe...