Blood Ties (A Sick Shit Barnabas X OC Fanfiction)

XLII

WARNING: CONTAINS DEPRESSION, SUICIDE ATTEMPTS

Sorry for not posting for so long, I’ve been sick... Yup, I had flu and I felt too lousy to write. And my depression decided to taunt me again as well. I often process my depression into my story. That really relieves me.

Anyway, enjoy!!!

I remember a night when we went out to some friends of our parents. I was nervous as fuck. Barnabas noticed it and tried to reassure me.

Our parents introduced us to them. ‘Tell them something about you.’

Barnabas had no effort with it, he always talked about himself. And about how amazing I was. 

‘And you?’ one of them asked me.

I suddenly had to piss badly. ‘Where’s the bathroom?’

Barnabas laughed. ‘Great first impression!’

‘Shut up, you fu…’ I started. But father gave me a warning look. 

‘Sorry, but where is it?’

‘Last door on the right,’ they said.

‘Thank you,’ I responded.

When I returned, I tried to tell them something about myself, but they didn’t seem to be interested. No, all they cared about was Barnabas. He noticed me feeling down. So, when we had to sit down, he gently squeezed my hand. It felt like he was encouraging me. 

But then, a cat brushed against my legs: ‘Meow.’

‘Ahhw, how sweet,’ I said. I kneeled down and patted the cat who purred satisfiedly.

‘She’s an animal lover,’ mother said.

So now, I was sitting opposite Barnabas instead of next to him. I was put in between two women that barely gave me a look. I felt extremely uncomfortable and I nervously fiddled with my hair.

They were talking about music. Piano music.

So I tried to join the conversation and said: ‘Oh, you like piano music? What a coincidence, I do, too!’

No response.

‘I play piano,’ I said. Still no response. They just continued their conversation. 

Suddenly, one of them asked: ‘Hey, girl, that Barnabas Collins, huh? That is your brother, right?’

‘Yeah,’ I said.

‘Is he married?’

‘No.’

‘Can you tell me something about what kind of woman he likes?’

‘No,’ I snapped. ‘Ask him himself. Stop using me for that!’ I turned my head and I continued to eat.

But my sight became blurry as tears began to well up in my eyes. I was so fucking done with this.

I couldn’t hold it in and I let out a soft sob. Barnabas looked up at me. 

I said: ‘I’m not hungry anymore, I’m going outside.’ and I got up and went into their garden.

A few minutes later, Barnabas came in and grabbed my hand. 

‘You really attract it, huh?’ he asked. 

I nodded. 

‘Don’t. You’re a very sweet, beautiful and clever girl,’ he whispered. 

‘No, I’m not,’ I whispered.

Barnabas gave me a hug. 

I couldn’t sleep that night. So I went downstairs and sat by the fireplace. It was freezing cold, but that didn’t bother me. Nobody liked me, so I could just freeze dead anyway. 

Soon, the cold was unbearable and I was chattering teeth like crazy. But I refused to get something to keep me warm. 

It was early in the morning now and I was stiffened from the cold. I could  barely move. It wasn’t light outside yet.

But then, I heard someone coming down the stairs and Barnabas came in. 

‘My god, Venus!’ he rushed to me. ‘Are you out of your head? For how long have you been sitting here?’

‘F-f-for n-n-nearly t-the w-w-whole n-n-night,’ I brought it out. 

‘Shit,’ he said. ‘You have to get warm. I’ll take you back to bed.’

‘No…’ I whispered. 

‘No? Of course you are. You listen to me.’ He sounded like a father and that annoyed me. 

Halfway on the way to bed, I lost my balance and I fell against Barnabas.

‘That was the dumbest you have ever done,’ he scolded me while he laid me down in his bed. 

The whole day, I’d been laying in his bed. And the next few days too. I’d somehow caught the flu. Barnabas constantly checked on me.

‘I’m gonna get the doctor, this has to stop,’ he said constantly.

The doctor came and asked me why I wanted to kill myself. 

Barnabas was distant all the time, like I had a dangerous contagious disease. He hadn’t kissed or even hugged me for like a whole week.

It hurt me. I longed for his hugs and his jokes. 

He came in again. ‘Did you tell him everything?’ 

I nodded. 

Barnabas sat down on the edge of his bed. I looked at him with teary eyes.

‘Sorry,’ I whispered. 

‘What should I do with that?’ he snapped. ‘This is ridiculous. You could’ve been dead!’

‘Oh, so I’m ridiculous?’

‘No, you ACT ridiculous!’

I began to cry. 

Barnabas didn’t respond at first, but he couldn’t just let me cry and he took me into his arms.

‘Ssh,’ he whispered. I cried even harder. 

Mother and father came in. ‘How is she doing, Barnabas? Is she okay?’

Barnabas told them to go away for a minute. He then grabbed my face with two hands.

‘Don’t do that ever again,’ he whispered. ‘You’re only eighteen. I can’t miss you yet!’

‘Why are you acting so distant?’ I asked.

‘Sorry for that,’ he whispered. ‘I just wanted to teach you a lesson.’ he leaned in.

‘No!’ I said. ‘No, you can’t kiss me, then you’ll also get the flu!’

‘I don’t care,’ he whispered. He pulled me close and put his lips on mine. It was different from the other ones.