Sinner for the Devil | l.s.

50

"I should look for some tattoo salons." I shared my thoughts with him when we arrived home from the cinema.
"I need a job." I couldn't stay home all the time, I would bore myself to death.

"Well, about that." Louis cleared his throat.

"You should rather look for some furniture you would like." he put his sneakers on their place.

"Furniture, for what?" I didn't understand, following him into the kitchen to hear his explanation.

"Your studio." he made himself a glass of water.

"My what?" my eyes almost bulged out of my head.

"I arranged it for you, it's not that far from the club which means I will have you close."

"Louis, why would you do that?" I couldn't believe it.

"What?"

"It's so much money, so much new things to do, to take care of. I have been in this business just for few months. I thought about getting the studio of my own after like a year of living here, and I certainly didn't want you to pay for everything."

"Am I the bad guy again?" he put the glass back down.

"I am not saying that."

"You do. I wanted to do something nice for you. I thought that's what you do in relationships, isn't it?"

"Louis-"

"Fuck off." he pushed past me into the hallway, leaving me in the kitchen on my own.

I didn't mean to be ungrateful, it just sounded like that from those words that I let out.

He was sitting on the couch in the living room with phone in hand.

"I didn't mean to sound ungrateful. It was really, really nice from you."
"Sure." he said sarcastically.
"Louis..."
"Harry-" he took a deep breath.
"This is so fucking much to take in. I mean, I care about you. I know I do, I realized that but- this- those things piss me off, really."
"I am sorry. I want to have a studio. It's just stressing me out a bit, you know? It's different from working for someone."

"Can you leave me alone?" he said with annoyance visible in his voice.

"Okay, I am sorry." I got up from the couch quickly, leaving him and the living room alone.

Why did I have to react that way?

I went into our bedroom, lying down on the surface of the bed for a moment and grabbing my phone to play some songs on low volume.

I knew he needed his time.

Few moments passed when I heard the loud slam of the entrance door.

Did he leave?

I opened the door from the bedroom carefully, peeking into the hallway. When I didn't notice anything or anyone I headed into the living room.
It was empty.
Yeah, I fucked up big time.

•••
I laid in the bed for hours. When I last checked the time it was 10pm.
In the end I picked up my phone, dialing my best friend's number.

"Har?" I could hear his -not even a little bit sleepy- voice.
"Can you talk for a bit? I understand if you-" he interrupted me.
"I want to talk. I haven't heard from you in some time! How is it going?" he questioned with excitement in his voice.
"Bad. I just fuck everything up." I tried to calm myself down. I really didn't want to cry in front of him.
"What are you talking about?"
"Is it about that kiss with your straight, now not so straight, friend?" he questioned.

"No. Louis had taken that one quite well actually."
"Really? That's good!"
"Yeah..." the tears prickled my eyes.
"What's going on, hm? You can tell me anything."
"Louis rented me a place for- for my own tattoo studio." I heard Zayn gasp on the other side of the phone.
"He did what? Wow. That's bloody amazing!"
"It's not." I sobbed.
"Why not?"
"I- I asked him why he did something like that. I told him I didn't want the studio right now, maybe like in a year."

"Oh, then... I guess I get what's wrong."
"He left. He was angry. I don't want him to be angry." I was slowly losing it again.

"You know what my mother used to tell me?"
"What?"
"Where are no arguments is no love."
"You will find a way to make up Harry. You just moved in together. Apart from that, Louis is still confused. He never was in situation like this and he is creeped out that he likes you this much. I am sure it will get better soon. You will both find a way." he said in soothing voice.
"I hope so."

"And how do you like England?" he tried to change the subject. It reminded me of the phrase 'How's the weather?'.
"I quite do. It's- it's good."

"Everything will be alright bub. Don't worry and just try- try to understand him. He is trying really hard to show you he means what he said to you in New York."
"Yeah." I sighed.
"Have a good night and try to get some sleep, you need it."
"Thank you Zee, thank you."
"You are welcome." and with that we ended our late night call.

I couldn't fall asleep though. I tried but I just couldn't. I kept overthinking everything in my head.

Louis came home late in the night, maybe around half past 1am.

His steps led straight into the bedroom where I was since he left.

"Hey." he mumbled, yanking off his expensive sneakers.

"Where were you?" I asked, my voice small.

"I was at the club." he jumped up on the bed, burying his red face into the pillows. He smelled of alcohol and cigarettes.

"Okay."
He bursted into fit of giggles.
"What's so funny?"
"You."
"I am funny?" I didn't know what should I expect.
"Yeah, but not in that way."
"In what way?" I was curious.

"You are hilarious and naive just as a little child. Do you really believe this is love, true love?"

I looked at him with hurt eyes.

"Do you love me?" I asked, not caring that he was drunk as fuck. I just wanted to hear it. Drunk people are the honest versions of themselves after all, aren't they?

"I told you, love is not real."

"Yeah, maybe not." I turned around in the bed, facing the wall instead of him.

I let the bitter tears fall down my cheeks like the hundredth time tonight.

•••
I woke up in the morning to whines coming from the person lying next to me.
"Jesus." Louis rasped.
"Good morning." he added later.

"Good morning." I got up from the bed immediately, walking over to the wardrobe, picking up some clothes for myself to dress into.

I dressed while still facing the wall, not glancing at him once.

"I will make some breakfast." I walked out of the door in silence, heading to the kitchen.

I prepared him a glass of water and also some paracetamol for his head before I took out the eggs from the fridge.

•••
He entered the kitchen with a little whine, walking over to the table where I was already eating my eggs.

"Thank you." he rasped, taking the pill and sitting down.

"Welcome." I kept scrolling through safari, looking over the latest news that kept popping up on my screen.

After he finished his meal I cleaned the whole kitchen and headed into the living room.

"What's wrong with you today?" he joined me a bit later.
"Nothing." I opened instagram to distract myself.
"Harry, don't make me mad."
"Mad? After what have you said." I chuckled bitterly.
"What are you talking about?"
"You called me hilarious." I glanced at him through teary eyes.
"What, no, I didn't." he defended himself.
"For believing this is love." I was just waiting for the tears to spill.
"Harry-" I got up to leave. He ran after me, catching my wrist.

"Hey, I was drunk. I didn't know what I was fucking saying, okay? You can't take that seriously! I am still getting used to those feelings, I don't fully understand them."

I had no idea what to say.

"Louis, why do we have to be so complicated?"

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A/N
Another day another chapter. More are yet to come!

Stay safe, I love you lots!<3