A Million Pieces - Hunger Games (Catching Fire & Mockingjay)

Chapter 27

Snow comes into my cell one day. He's the first thing I see, when Barrere kicks me awake. There's nothing for him to hit but bone, and he smiles the smile that appears in my nightmares.

I have no strength. I have nothing to say. There is nothing to say.

"Miss Ayers, you look perfectly tortured. It will translate well on camera. We are going to do something a bit different today." I look up at him, blank eyes barely registering what I see. Again, I don't bother answering. "You are going to have to speak when you are with Flickerman. District 13 has been launching propaganda videos, so I believe your friends need a little reminder of your existence. That we have you here and that we are doing whatever we want with you." He smiles. "Mr Mellark showed this a few days ago and made a satisfactory speech about how poor Miss Everdeen is being used by the rebels. Unfortunately, it did not have the impact we hoped, so you will both make an appearance today. I trust you will do as you should."

I stay silent, my eyes closed. I know Peeta was on television. He came back in a suit and he let me touch it. It was the first softness I had felt in forever. I know that interview was the first time anyone would have seen what they are doing to him. To us. I know that he did as he was told. Days, weeks, months ago - I don't even know now - he was offered a deal to protect Katniss. I told him it was likely an empty promise, but Peeta was willing to die for her, so of course an empty promise is better than nothing. He was fed the words he should say, the ideas he was supposed to promote.

There's a faint idea in the back of my mind that maybe I should worry about what the rebels think of Peeta, with all his talk of cease-fire. But that part of me, the part that has the strength to hope, the part that could afford to think about the future... that part of me has been shattered.

I feel myself being lifted off my feet and dragged to a brightly lit room. My prep team doesn't speak to me, but their soft hands are enough. I let tears run down my face as they take my clothes off and lower me into a bathtub full of warm water. They gently wash the blood and grime off me, careful fingers mixed with soothing soap and lotion. The towel they pat me dry with is soft and fluffy, and I want to stay in it forever. Eventually they manage to coax me out of the towel and they slide a dress over my frail body. It reaches my calves and the sleeves cover half my arms. My prep team tries to adjust how it sits on my body, but nothing fits me right anymore.

They cut my hair at my shoulders and leave it loose, then finish with a coat of makeup. I can tell it barely covers the cuts and bruises and dark circles, and I wonder if Snow intentionally requested this. My brown skin - that had always been paired with a tan - looks unnaturally pale now. I don't get to see myself in the mirror, but judging from how I feel and the way Hebe leaves the room while Adonis stares at me and Persephone purses her lips, I don't look all that great.

Barrere comes to take me from them, and he walks me down to Caesar's set. He tries to stay a few feet away from me, which is a first, but I can barely walk, so he puts a hand on my shoulder to simultaneously keep me away and support me.

He sits me down in the chair opposite Caesar, whose eyes are wide as he looks me over. Snow appears beside me. He whispers in my ear.

"There is not much to be said. We just want to show the rebels, especially Miss Everdeen, Mr Rivera and Mr Odair, what happens when you disrespect the Capitol and threaten the structure of Panem. Mr Mellark will go on after you. We've told him what to say, but we trust you can answer Caesar satisfactorily on your own. But do not misunderstand me. If you speak out of turn, you will be punished."

My eyes screw shut. When I open them again, Snow is off to the side and Caesar is waiting for me.

"Action!" someone shouts, and the little red lights from the cameras turn on at once. I tense for a second, because they look like scarlet eyes.