Dear Iris [h.s]

chapter fifteen.

Iris Grace

Fuck. My. Life.

For some reason I thought it would be a good idea to go home to my family home. I woke up with a banging headache and when I went downstairs to make myself some breakfast that was only worsened when Thomas and my dad started shouting for absolutely no reason.

I kissed Harry last night. Twice. If Thomas got wind of that he'd never talk to me again, and if my dad heard, I don't think I'd ever be allowed to step foot in this house again. He hates Harry, for the same reason he dislikes me. Harry isn't a businessman, and in my dad's eyes that means he's a failure.

We shouldn't have kissed. It was just a drunken mistake and it won't happen again. It can't. A kiss is not worth the screaming and heartache I'll endure if my family were to find out. I don't even want to know what George would do to Harry if he knew. I'm not worth a burst lip, bloody nose and a body covered in cuts and bruises. Nobody is.

It infuriates me to think that just one simple mistake can have such vast consequences. It was just a drunken kiss, we shouldn't be stressing about it so much, but because our families are such horrible people, the consequences are so terrifying that panicking is the only thing you can do.

"You didn't spend a lot of time with George last night I noticed." My dad said as I'm pouring the boiled kettle water into my flask.

"He wasn't very nice so I didn't necessarily want to." I sighed nervously.

I could feel the glance shared between Thomas and my dad, even with my back turned. My mum walked out of the room, she always does when she knows this is going to escalate into something she doesn't want to hear. I wish she didn't, I wish she stayed to defend me, but she would never. Not when it jeopardizes her idea of the 'perfect family'. If she doesn't witness the faults, there aren't any.

"For gods sakes Iris." My dad muttered, rolling his eyes frustratedly. "You're gonna be alone for the rest of your fucking life, you know that?"

"I wouldn't mind." I swallowed back the nerves causing my voice to crack.

"I would." He bluntly said. "People are gonna think I failed at raising my daughter to be a normal human being.

You failed at raising your daughter full stop.

My dad stormed out and Thomas shook his head, looking at me in disgust. I'm not part of this family, I couldn't be further from it. If I was part of this family, I wouldn't feel like such a stranger here. I'd feel like less of a burden too. That's all I want. To go one day without being an inconvenience to somebody, an extra weight on their shoulders they've to carry.

I grabbed my things from the house, tossed it in my bag and off I went. Desperate to get out of there and the place that's filled with nothing but bad memories. I barely have anything at my studio either so I need to walk by the stalls and pick up a few things, at least that'll fill me with a little happiness.

I love the women that work at the stalls selling fruit, vegetables, clothes, and little artsy things. They're such lovely women who have the purest souls. I'm on first name terms with them all, Doris runs the fruit stalls throughout the whole town and she always saves me a basket of fresh produce.

Christina and her family live on a farm, so they provide a lot of the goods to these women. When Christina has leftover strawberries she always brings them here because she knows I love making jam. She always tells me I could make a living out of it, open my own food stall just selling my jam.

I often drop off a jar to the ladies at the stalls, they also love it, but nobody could compare to Rosa's raspberry jam. She bakes the most amazing things ever and I'm convinced her raspberry jam could cure any illness ever.