HI I'M BACK!! feeling terrible these past few months so i've only been writing angst :,)
Your pov
Tonight is the one thing left
And I haven't said it yet, I'm falling
And the writings on the wall
My eyes are sealed shut as tears relentlessly spilled out from them. Vision blurry, I stared at the walls with the writings "Akaashi and (Name) ♡︎" Our names were written by Akaashi, and I drew a heart beside it, not that it matters now anyway.
Today was misery
And I just can't believe this happened
And I finally broke down
I've been holding on tightly to this relationship, desperately clinging onto every ounce of hope that somehow, we'll make it. I don't know if I'm trying to convince Akaashi or myself that it'll be okay anymore.
He held onto my heart
But now my only star is falling
Its burning to the ground
My tongue is tied over three words. No matter what he has put me through, I just can't seem to bring myself to say these three words. Once upon a time, he was my everything. I would do anything for him, and sadly still will even when things have gone sour and crumbled.
Now I'm crying out
I cannot keep my emotions in anymore. I know this has to end or it'll just hurt me further. Sometimes, holding on does more damage than letting go. Akaashi absentmindedly looked up from his phone, that same stoic expression I fell in love with but now wished it held more emotions. He does not seem the least bit concerned about my break down. I have to end this.
Secret love, my escape
Take me far far away
Secret love, are you there
Will you answer my prayer
These were words we once said when we were younger and so in intoxicated by each other's love.
Please take me anywhere but here
Anywhere but here
"Let's break up," I managed to mutter between pitiful sobs. I took a deep breath and roughly wiped the tears on my face. I rushed past him and into my room. Our already strained relationship exacerbated throughout these years, leading to us having separate bedrooms.
You're all I've got right now
No one else figures out this feeling
And how lonely it can get
I was so stupidly in love with Akaashi that I pushed all my friends away. I stopped hanging out with them because my world revolves around Akaashi. I've nobody to blame but myself for not having anyone else to count on. Unlike me, people naturally gravitate towards Akaashi, he never has to worry about being alone. Everybody loves him. I wished somebody warned me how important it is to have friends other than your significant other. I feel more alone than ever right now.
These words can cut right through
Cause all along I've knew you're sorry
But you haven't said it yet
I still vividly remember the first time I caught you chatting up other women and treating them like how you used to treat me when we were madly in love. You never confessed about what you did, I had to confront you. "I'm sorry, okay? She's pretty but I'm with you, not her." That was not comforting at all but being in love makes us stupid so I forgave you again and again, time after time.
But I won't forget
I finished packing all my belongings and returned to the hallway, only to see Akaashi's eyes glued on his phone again. He didn't bother fighting for us, he didn't even have anything to say to me. It's like he was waiting for this moment, when he's finally free to be with someone else. This is going to leave a nasty scar in my heart.
Secret love, my escape
Take me far far away
Secret love, are you there
Will you answer my prayer
Please take me anywhere but here
These were words we once said when we were younger and so in intoxicated by each other's love.
Akaashi's pov
When we're together
Thoughts of her disappear
If I fell to pieces
You'd heal this pain I feel
I fell out of love with (Name) years ago. I wonder when things first went wrong. Was it when we started arguing about the smallest things or when we moved in and spent too much time with each other? I don't know and couldn't care less. Darla and I started texting more and I found out that we have more in common. Ah, I remember when things first went wrong. It's when I cancelled my weekly movie date night with (Name) for Darla.
Secret love, my escape
Take me far far away
Secret love, are you there
Will you answer my prayer
These were words we once said when we were younger and so in intoxicated by each other's love.
Secret love, my escape
Take me far far away
Secret love, are you there
Will you answer my prayer
Now I'm saying these words to someone else.
Please take me anywhere but here
Anywhere but here
I'm sorry (Name) but I'm happier with Darla now. I don't want to hurt you further so I won't mention this, but I genuinely wish you well.
hi guys! my major examinations are finally over :^) It's 5am and I tried something new so it might not be of quality i'm so sorry TT
happy reading !!
- mirai <3
