RUN |on hold|

I'm telling you!

chapter 14

Asterin POV

I took a deep breath and clasped my hands together, as they had begun to tremble.

Footsteps echoed through the hall and I could clearly feel Lorenzo's anger and impatience at my back. His eyes were probably boring into my body to the point where he could see my soul.

"What was that about just now? Can you explain that to me for a second?"

His voice was quite a bit closer by now and sounded really, really pissed.

Stubbornly, I shook my head and finally turned to face him. The second bad decision I had made that day. His black hair hung in a shaggy frown, but what worried me were his eyes. The usually cold blue was now darker and underlined with an anger I had never seen in my life. Not even in my uncle.

Startled, I took a step back, but his hand darted out and grabbed my wrist not so gently. I drew in a sharp breath and looked down at his hand gripping my joint.

"Let go of me, Lorenzo."

But he did not hear. His eyes were stubborn and transfixed on me and for the umpteenth time he asked, "What was that about? What was going on!"

But again I shook my head.

A deep sound escaped his chest and, startled, I jumped back and managed to pull my wrist away with that strength.

Quickly I turned around, but once again his voice made my body pause in mid-motion. "Te lo giuro, Asterin. If you don't tell me what just happened then God have mercy I don't know what I'll do. That was a damn important deal and if I didn't get it because of a cagna like you, then-"

The dams broke and now tears were streaming freely down my cheek. By now I was sure half the house was awake at our shouting.

"I got touched, that's what happened!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Lorenzo POV

"I was touched, that's what happened!"

Her words echoed through the empty entrance hall, leaving a ghostly silence. Tears streamed down her cheeks and I could see she was pulling herself together to keep from breaking down.

Briefly I allowed a look of concern to cross my face, but shortly afterwards my face became a mask again. What did I care if she was touched or not?

Apparently she seemed to realise this, for her features fell and a heartbreaking sob escaped her throat.

Then she stormed up the stairs and slammed the door behind her. A strange ache spread through my chest, but I paid no attention, instead making my way to my bedroom. It was time for me to go to sleep.

Before I could go to sleep, however, I heard a scream.

I briefly thought about checking, but then decided against it. Asterin was a grown woman, so she should behave like one and solve her fucking problems on her own.

-----------------------------------------------------------------

Asterin POV

Sweat was pouring down my forehead, but I couldn't wake up. The sweat mixed with the tears I had been shedding for hours and was still shedding.

The blanket felt too tight, too warm, but I could do nothing. I was paralysed.

My uncle had guests there. They were noisy.

My seventeen-year-old self lay transfixed on the bed, pressing a hand to her bleeding belly.

Her uncle had been in a bad mood because apparently she hadn't cleaned the house properly, preferring to do unnecessary things like schoolwork.

He had become so angry that he had pushed her around the flat and she had stumbled against the kitchen counter. She had been too late to catch herself and had accidentally pushed one of the expensive cups on the floor.

Her uncle had kindly asked her to pick up the broken pieces and since it was the first time he had asked for something, she did it.

A naïve and stupid girl. How stupid she had been before....

So she bent over the shards and set about cleaning them up.

But as soon as she had bent over the shards, her uncle shoved a foot into her back, causing her to fall over in front and thus crash into the shards.

Most of them dug into her stomach and some into her palms.

Without another word, her uncle had left the kitchen, but not before he had pushed her into the pile of shards once more.

She had had to swallow the screams and sobs.

Asterin could still remember exactly how she had pulled the shards out of her flesh, piece by piece. Some had gone in deep, some only superficially. But since she had no bandages in her room, she had to press old clothes and toilet paper on her wounds and hope that no infection would develop.

As if I could still feel the pain, seconds later I was sitting upright in bed, stomach churning. With my body drunk on sleep, I staggered into the bathroom and managed to bend over the toilet bowl just in time.

The little food and water emptied from my stomach and my head spun.

New tears ran down my cheeks and my exhausted body hung on the edge of the bath.

Everything hurt. My legs, my stomach, my back. My head was spinning and images from my past flashed before my inner eyes.

With a long and slow breath, I pulled myself to the other end of the bathtub and turned on the tap. I needed to get the feeling of his hands off my body. Even if I had been in the shower a few hours ago.

With weak arms, I twisted my hair into a bun and then pulled off my pyjamas.

So, shivering, I lowered myself into my midnight bath and looked out the window. Yes, the bathroom did have a floor-to-ceiling window. But you could only look out and not in.

The warm water lapped at my body as I pressed my legs to my chest and hugged them.

Slowly but surely my eyes closed and I just managed to get out of the bath before I would have fallen asleep there.

I didn't have enough strength to put on my clothes, so I didn't do it.

In bed, I pulled the warm sheets tighter around my naked body and fell into a dreamless sleep.