Colliding with Malfoy

Part 42

The last night that Draco and I had together was amazing. But things had gotten weird between us, I wasn't sure why. I know I had been distant towards him all year, but now he was being distant towards me or it had seemed that way. When I got the chance to talk to him I planned on confronting him about it. I made my way into defense against the dark arts. He was already there reading something in his book. "Hey," I said. "Hey," he said but he didn't look up at me. "Can we talk?" I asked. He was quite for a moment. "Yes, I need to talk to you myself..." he said. This made me worry, what did he need to talk about. "Okay, after class?" I said. He nodded. I went to grab his hand from under the table but he moved it. Why was he being like this towards me. I just wanted to cry right there in class. We didn't talk the rest of the class period. I felt sick at my stomach, I didn't know what he was going to tell me but I had a feeling I wasn't going to like it.

When class ended he shot out of his seat, but I didn't give him a chance to walk out. "You didn't forget about me? Did you?" I asked. "No, I'm heading to the room of requirement right now." He said. I nodded. "Okay, I'll meet you there." He walked out and headed that was I gathered my things and headed that way myself. I was hoping whatever he had to tell me wasn't as bad as I felt like it was going to be. I was hoping he'd finally open up too me. The hallways was empty so I walked up and waited for the door to appear. I slowly walked in and waited for it to open. Draco stood there, looking nervous his hands were even in his pockets. I closed the door and stood there awkwardly for a moment. "Draco..." he cut me off. "Kaylee, I know you've noticed I've been distant." I nodded. "Did I do something wrong the last time we you know.." he shook his head. "No, not at all, don't blame any of this on yourself you're perfect in every way. This is all me." I nodded. "Okay," I said. He looked so nervous. "There really isn't any easy way to do this." He said. I felt like I was going to throw up. "I think we have to end this Kaylee, and I really mean it this time, it's not you I promise." His words stabbed through my heart I didn't expect him to say this at all. "Draco what are you even saying? We have no reason to break up." I could feel tears streaming down my face. I walked over to him to grab his hands but he stepped back. "Draco..." my voice was cracking. "Why? What can I do to change your mind. Please." I was begging. "Kaylee I love you I don't want to do this but I have too." I shook my head, "if you love me you don't have too." I stepped closer. "Please," I added. "Don't make this harder than it has to be Kaylee, this is already killing me." He was crying too. "Than why do it?" I was sobbing harder at this point. "My family Kaylee, you know about them, you have your brother to think about," I was confused, why does any of this have to do with my brother. "I know about your family but that isn't you Draco, I love you please." His tears started coming out faster. "You don't understand Kaylee." He said. "I can't have you in the middle of this, he is your only family, you're going to do everything to protect him as you should." I was confused. "Yes, but that doesn't mean I don't love you Draco, just stop talking all the nonsense." He looked me straight in the eyes. "Kaylee, I've made some promises to people I can't take back. I've been forced to do something's because of my fathers mistake." He was crying pretty hard. "I love you, so much. I love you enough to know I have to let you go. I can't let you watch me be this person who I am not." He let out. My heart sank. Was he doing something for the death eaters and this has been his big secret. "What promises, what have you been forced to do? You don't have to keep them not for him." I said. "It's not that easy." He said. "Draco stop, you've been shutting me out all year if your gonna break my hear I at least deserve to know the truth." I hated this. I loved him so much I don't think anything he told me at this point could make me hate him. He stepped back from me. "Draco..." he started taking off his jacket. "What are you doing?" He started unbuttoning his shirt. He slowly took it off than I see it. I seen his mark. My tears stopped I was in shock. This isn't him, he isn't one of them. "Draco, this isn't who you are." I said. He started putting his shirt back on. "Just know, this wasn't fully my choice." He said. "But, this... this is why you can't be with me." He said. "I still love you Draco." I said. He was quite. "How can you still "love me" after that." He said. "You know how death eaters are, why are you not running out of here right now." But that's the thing, he wasn't a death eater, he wasn't like them. "Because, you aren't like them. You won't hurt me." I said. "We still can't be together, I can't put you in that situation Kaylee, I love you too much to do that." My tears came flooding back. "Please don't do this too me." I begged. "Kaylee, I don't want to this either you're one of the best things that has happened to me." He said. "Than don't." I begged. "Kaylee.. we can't." I felt like I couldn't breath. "Come here," I said. He slowly walked over towards me. I wrapped my arms around him. "I know this isn't you, your secret is safe with me I promise." I said. He wrapped his arms around me. "I know, I can trust you, but I still can't let this continue, maybe when all this is over, we can try again." I just cried into his chest. "I'll wait forever for you if I have too." I said. "I will do the same." He said. He slowly slipped away from my hug. "I never meant to hurt you in this way Kaylee..." I couldn't even speak anymore I just cried. "I love you." He said. I still didn't say anything. Next thing I knew he was walking out. He was gone. I sat on the couch and cried. I cried so much I fell asleep.

When I woke up I wanted nothing more than Draco to be there. But, he wasn't. We really broke up, I didn't want too. I knew him being a death eater couldn't have been fully his choice. His heart was too big to be like them. I honestly am surprised at my reaction I feel like I knew all along he was a death eater. Apart of me believe Harry's accusations however, I didn't care. I loved Draco Malfoy. I stood up and knew the room of requirement was the last place I needed to be. Mostly because there is way to many memories in here with him. I walked out and it must have been dinner time, I could see people walking towards the great hall. I started to walk that way and than I seen him. We looked right at each other. My heart sank, I just turned around and walked to the dorms. I didn't have an appetite anyways. There was no one in the dorms and thank goodness because, I was crying hysterically. I just lied on my bed, and let the tears come out. I hated this. I hated everything that was going on right now. I never wanted to leave this bed. I wasn't even tired, but I still managed to cry myself to sleep.