Loosely Knotted [2/2] [✔]

Fifteen

Meredith's POV

Me and Derek wake up the next morning, naked and tangled in each others embrace. I'm still shocked at the conversation I walked into yesterday with him and Ma.

As much as I want to get everything back on track because, seeing Derek look so worried made me feel so guilty but at the same time, it's not the worst thing in the world if I just lose just a little bit more.

I'm not going to get to the point where I need to get admitted again to some psychiatric ward. This is just about me becoming healthier.

I get up and go downstairs to find that Carolyn is already in the kitchen.

"Coffee?"

Why is she so.. alert in the mornings? 

I nod in her direction and yawn simultaneously. I slowly wander over to where we keep my cereal, and to the cupboard to collect a bowl before heading back to the kitchen island. By the time I got there, Carolyn has delivered the magical caffeine of which I gulped down. The cup was emptied and refilled in quick succession, thanks to Ma.

I don't think I've noticed it before but, me and Derek are eerily similar in the morning. When he came into the kitchen, he yawned and answered the demand for coffee before picking up cereal and a bowl, then went to the kitchen island. He finished his coffee as fast as I did. 

How have I just notice this?

After I have an adult sized portion of cereal, with a reasonable amount of milk I tell the other two that I'm going to go have a shower and get ready for the day. It's hard to avoid how proud Derek and Carolyn looked when they saw the size of my breakfast. 

They was probably just proud that I ate, after worrying I had relapsed, right? It wasn't because they thought it was too much, was it? 

After 30 minutes, both me and Derek were ready and were saying our goodbyes to Carolyn. We arranged to be back at the same time, so we could all have a meal together. They said it was to celebrate me agreeing to go back to therapy. Personally, I feel it's a bit ironic - less than 12 hours ago they was convinced I had relapsed and now we're having a celebratory meal..

We get to the hospital and Derek feels the need to come with me up to Dr Wyatt's room to book and appointment. I told him several times that I was capable of doing it myself but he kept telling me how he understood how difficult I find these things and he wanted to support me.

I knock on the door and a familiar face opens it.

"Meredith, hi. How are you?" Dr Wyatt welcomes me, opens the door wider for me to enter but I stay in the same spot. Determined to never enter that room ever again..

"Could I book an appointment with you, for maybe later today?"

"Oh, yeah sure. I'm free at 3pm for an hour?"

"Sounds good. I'll see you then. Thank you for being able to fit me in." I watch her face as it questions mine, puzzled over my formal tone.

 Dr Wyatt closes the door and me and Derek walk away. I feel like I'm shaking right through my body. Derek kisses my temple and I melt into him. God, he makes me feel safe.

We eventually have to separate so we can get on with our day. 

It was around 2.30 when I noticed the time so I decide to make a call..

"You're through to Dr Wyatt's mail box. I'm currently with a patient right now, but I will call you back as soon as I can."

Thank goodness, she didn't pick up the call..

"Hi, Dr Wyatt. This is Meredith Grey, I'm just letting you know that I've just been called into a surgery so I can't make it to our session that we have booked this afternoon. Sorry that this is last minute. Thanks. Bye."

Now that is dealt with, I need to go to stage two of my plan..

I picked up a small bag that I had in my office and headed down to the tunnels and snuck out of the backdoor. Thankfully the building that I needed was only a five minute walk away, or a 2 minute run. 

I got there and walked in to speak to the receptionist.

"I'd like to sign up please."

"Sign this sheet of paper, these are the payment options, pick one and tick it." 

I stood to the side and did what was asked. I returned it to the less-than-cheerful receptionist whose only response was, "Welcome to Seattle Gym, thank you for choosing us, for choosing health."

Choosing health? That is exactly what I'm doing. 

I set an alarm on my phone for one hours time so I have enough time to get back to the hospital. As long as I have weekly appointments with Dr Wyatt scheduled, I can come here. 

This is perfect.