Everlasting; The Promised Neverland [Reader Insert]

39 | The First

The chuckle sounds cuter than you thought.

"I don't know a thing so enlighten me, make me understand thus I can help you."

Everything is warm.

The blowing wind, the feeling on your ears, the tension over your chest, the skin on your jaw where Ray touches you, and all of them are pleasant. Not only that but it also feels prosperously safe.

Your mind wonders for the last time whether opening up to someone new—to Ray—is the right choice. What will happen if you tell him, what things that can be changed, you never really know as you can't foretell the future.

However, you know what it's that you want, one thing that both your heart and logic can both agree.

You want to trust him. As much as the trust he bestows upon you.

You sigh a shaky breath beforehand, without giving him any warning or whatsoever you said, "I killed those researchers in Lambda for our escape."

As how hard to finally say those words out, it leaves a strong bitterness too when it went through your tongue. Yet you fully understand you can't stop only at that and so you continued. "S—Smee said t—that no witness, nobody should left the site at all cost in order for our escape to success."

Unconsciously, you fist the front fabric of Ray's jacket because jitteriness is taking the ton out of you. You force yourself to keep looking at Ray's eyes the entire time, waiting for his reaction and if he hold his words.

Just as Ray has promised, his expression is remain indifferent. You notice his eyes are widen for the slightest bit but it backs again after he blinks.

He really hold his promise.

You can't feel the relief, however. Ray is keeping his promise but you're anxious for his later reaction, what will he say and how he will proceed the new revelation.

The fear grows worse as the time goes and Ray is still remained silent.

Desperate and scared, you asked, "Can you actually tolerate it?"

You don't know how exactly long does Ray keep his mouth shut, but it is twice or more longer for you. All your surroundings are becoming insignificant when your head is enveloped in thick cloud of constant regret and anxiety.

I did a mistake, didn't I? I shouldn't told him, should I?

These repeating question are circling your head to the point you felt your head ache from every corner. One thing comes to your mind.

Run.

You have to leave before you're drowned in another self admission of guilt.

No matter how hard you want to trust him, your self conscious is always throwing everything upside down at the end.

He lied, he won't be able to tolerate it. How silly of you. Of course no one will ever can tolerate a murderer.

But before you even can move a step back, you see Ray's body is getting closer to your view and you feel something is touching your forehead.

It was for a brief moment, yet you clearly comprehend what just happened.

He just kissed your forehead.

You lift your head up, searching for his eyes and for answer of what did the gesture mean. Despite of answering your curiosity, you then surprised by two consecutive peck on each side of your cheek. You gasp and flinch in his hold, face is getting unbelievably red.