One shots of Stiles Stilinski BOOK 1

The three humans

Chaotic fic time!

Danny and Stiles sat on the couch with identical pouts on their faces as everyone in the pack glared at them.

It wasn't their fault that they ran into...problems

Sure they probably should have told someone that I told taking a plane back home for the holidays they were taking a car (not the jeep, Danny refused and threatened Stiles) and having a mini road trip.

Of course both of them forgot the fact that Stiles was practically a magnet for trouble of any kind and Danny had a past of getting semi involved with anything supernatural every time.

But really it's not their fault.

So maybe they should have known better than to accept help from a stranger when their car broke down ("Oh would you look at that Danny boy! We are stuck in the middle of not and you can't even blame my jeep because we didn't take the jeep!" "...shut up Stiles.")

And maybe they should have called someone in the pack when they started to get nervous. Or y'know...at least make sure their phones where charged. ("Do we have the charger?" "You said your brought it?" "Oops?" "Stiles!" "Well what can go wrong Bernie and the time we reach a gas station and buy one?")

And maybe they shouldn't have accepted food from a stranger. ("Look we haven't eaten anything homemade in months Danny let me enjoy this!" "You call your father and you threaten him to make sure he eats healthy food but you are perfectly fine with us surviving on energy drinks, coffee, and stale chips!" "It's how I show I care and how ever told you I care about myself?")

And maybe they should have ran away from the danger instead of running towards it. ("This may be the only time I'll test out my theory Stiles!" "You want to see if you can hack into it and blow it up! We've blown stuff up on accident this is on purpose! Of course it'll work!" "This is a once in a life time opportunity!"

And maybe they shouldn't have just turned around and fixed their car while covered in...dirt? ("This isn't fucking dirt Stiles!" "Let me pretend it is!")

And maybe they should have at least cleaned up before they arrived at the pack house instead of coming with a car that had odd vents and scratches and them covered in grime and dirt and with parts of their clothes burnt. ("My favorite shirt Danny! This was my favorite shirt!" "Doesn't mean it was a nice looking shirt- ow!")

Now here they were, being forced to answer questions they really didn't want to answer.

But of course it can't be that easy, of course someone just had to open their mouth.

"I can't believe you two did this again." Allison said with a snort.

Everyone turned towards her, Danny and Stiles with betrayed expressions on their face while everyone else looked shocked.

"Again?!"

"Stilinski if you kill my best friend-"

"Danny! I thought you were responsible!"

"Allison how do you even know that?"

Scott's question caused everyone to pause and look tag the three humans.

"Okay look-" before Allison could explain Stiles opened his mouth.

If he was going down she was going with him.

"Allison sorta got married to this gnome and she threatened us to help her." Allison hissed at Stiles while everyone else (except Danny who was smirking) looked at them in shock.

"Don't forget the part where you somehow got offered as a gift to some fairy Stiles." Danny said.

Stiles ignored the gleeful look on Allison's face, everyone was so convinced she was some sort of Disney princess but he knew the truth, he glowered at Danny.

"Says the one who ended up making us wanted criminals in some town that I'm pretty sure is connected to Florida through a magical sink hole!"

The pack watched as the three humans started yelling about who did what. Turns out the humans got into more trouble when away from the pack.

"Listen here you little shit! I got stuck in some arranged marriage so you wouldn't go to jail!"

"Well no one asked you to do that Stiles!"

"Allison, I let you dye my hair and cover my whole body in some glow stick stuff! I had a date the next night and the guy ran away because he thought I was some alien!"

"Stiles, you forced me to babysit a lama and then you never picked it up! What the hell am I supposed to do with a lama?!"

"That wasn't even my lama! And Danny you forced me to help you with some project and didn't tell me until five minutes before that I would be dancing around the room dressed like a chicken!"

"No one else would help me! And Allison you forced me to give your dad the gay sex talk when you found out he and Peter were dating!"

"And you made me help him! Do you understand how painful that was? No one enjoyed that Allison!"

"It's not my fault I don't know anything about that! And you both had me be your fake girlfriend when those guys wouldn't leave you alone!"

Lydia closed her eyes for a moment before yelling, "Enough! Will one of you three please explain what happened?"

The three humans froze and exchanged a glance. "Well you know how Stiles and I would help each other out every now and then? Somehow Allison got involved and then all three of us got involved in some...stuff?"

Derek looked at them in disbelief, "So what? You all accidentally became friends because you got into stupid situations and needed each other's help?"

The three exchanged glances before shrugging.

"We may not be wolves but we are more feral then the rest of you combined because we've had to deal with your bullshit. I think we deserve some credit for lasting as long as we did."

Cora pinched the bridge of her nose, "Congratulations everyone we broke them and now the world has to deal with it."

Three maniac grins turned towards Cora in response.

I know it's not my best and I'll probably do another one but hey I tried.