Remember When

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT- TRUST

AN: Dedicated once again to asdfghjkLIANAAA for making me update already.

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“Uh, James, what are you doing here?” I asked nervously, his violet-gray eyes told something else I couldn’t comprehend. However I have a hunch I should get him out of my front porch before things get dirty.

            “Jane!” he shouted merrily, throwing his hands out in air in happiness and almost fell if the wall didn’t caught his unstable body, his balance swaying. When he spoke, a stinging stench of alcohol made me scoff. Okay now. This will be pretty cliché; I watch enough movies to know this kind of scene.

            A guy who got dumped would get drunk and go to that girl then say… “I really, really, do love you.” He croaked in his drunken voice.

Yep, thought so.

            “James… what the hell are you doing here?” I asked in a motherly tone, crossing my arms over my chest and giving him a glare.

            “What do you mean? I’m…” he burped loudly, making me scowl at his breath, “…here to confess my love for you!”  He jumped up and down, throwing tantrums like a four years old. I gave him a murderous glare, if looks could really kill, he’d be a dead meat. Before I could realize what was happening, I was shoved into the house and got pushed to the wall… hard.

            “What the—“and again, I didn’t even finished what I was going to say, forceful lips slammed into my own, making me gag.

            “James!!!” I was trying to push him away, trying to find my escape, but drunk or not; he’s too strong for me. His lips left mine and instead, he planted wet kisses down my jaw until he sucked on my neck. I could feel tears brimming in my eyes as I try to beg him to stop and shout for help, but it was no use. Using the strength I got was useless and my eyes widened in fear when his rough, strong hands started to make way under my shirt, making me scream for dear life.

            And that was a bad move.

            He pulled away from me and I quickly pulled down my shirt to cover my bare stomach. He looked at me with dead, lust-full eyes making me flinch even more, “Shut up you little bitch.”

This is not the James I know.

            His fist connected to my stomach, making me gasp in pain and I fell to the floor. My eyes landed on the now closed door and I pulled myself up to reach for it even if my body argued with me. Not even being able to take two steps, my foot was pulled back making me land back on the floor with a thud; my face hit to it and I could feel bruise would start to form on my cheek later.

            “You’re not going to get away with me!” he growled as he turned me around to face him. Lying on the floor, he got on top of me and he shred my top off, making the tears that was forming in my eyes flow. His lips kissed my stomach, leaving some of his saliva that could make me gag. He cupped one of my breasts and I squirmed, shouting even more and kicking me legs; and again, it was useless.

            I started to cry and cry, begging him to stop. I almost lost hope when the door suddenly banged open and I almost screamed for joy.

            Carson grabbed James’ shirt by the collar, his eyes shouting anger. Though anger was an understatement.

            He yanked James away from me and threw him across the room. I crawled away from them and suited myself in the corner. I wrapped my arms protectively around me and whimpered. I was so scared. I let out the tears flow even more as I watch Carson and James break down into a fight. James stood up angrily and connected his fist to Carson’s jaw. But it didn’t even seem to affect him. He quickly returned James the punch, making him land again on the floor. He growled in pain and was about to stand up to fight but Carson beat him to it. Carson was on top of James, and the next thing I knew; Carson made James’ face so bloody with his strong punches that James didn’t fight back any more.

            “Carson… stop….” I whispered, my voice unrecognizable, I was shocked he heard me. I was glad he listened and stopped tormenting James. He yanked James again by the collar, making him stood up, his face were dripping a lot of blood. His eye was already bruising.

            “Get out of here.” Carson said with hatred and coldness. Without another word, James went out of the house and Carson quickly made his way to me. He didn’t say anything; he just took me in his arms and let me sob uncontrollably on his shoulders, not caring that I was not wearing a shirt and only a bra as my top. He stroked my hair softly and rubbed my back soothingly as he rested his chin on my head.

            “I’m sorry…” I pulled away slightly as I look at his now wet shirt because of my tears; he just shook his head and made me lean on him again.

            “Don’t be.”

            What seemed like an eternity, I stopped crying, I felt so weak.

            Dirty. Disgusting.

            Carson suddenly carried me bridal style making me startle but I was so tired to move. He made his way to my room and placed me on my bed carefully. He took a shirt from my closet and helped me wear them. I didn’t protest on that, I was too tired to move on my own.

            I sat down on bed, resting my back on the wall and sighed. I was beginning to miss the warmth of Carson’s body; he just sat there by my side, looking at me with concern and pain in his eyes.

            “Thank you…” I whispered to him.

            “What for?”

            “For saving me.” It really hurts a lot, because I’ve been through that. The pain was doubled, knowing that James of all people could possibly pull something like that on me.

            “Have you forgotten?” he asked instead.

            “Forgotten what?” I asked curiously as I hugged the blanket that was covering me.

            “Remember when I saw you crying in the rain after your dance practice?” he asked again.

            “Oh, that.” I suddenly remember that dancing slut. Then I had the urge to ask, “Are you and Kim had a thing?” the words left my mouth. Carson gave m a weird look.

            “No. I was… I don’t know… got frozen in the spot.” He explained and I saw the sincerity in his eyes, making me smile. “Hey, how did you know about that?” he raised an eyebrow at me and I shrugged instead. He realized I didn’t want to talk about it so he dropped the subject with a sigh.

            “Why did you make me stop beating James anyway?” he asked again, annoyance clear in his perfect face as bright as day.

            “Because he’s your brother.” I retorted like it was the most obvious thing in the world. And really, it was.

            “That does not make what he did excusable!” he snapped at me and I know I had to soften my mood; he didn’t deserve my bad mood.

            “I know.” I placed my hand on his and I saw his eyes soften at my touch. “But I don’t want to get in the way of the both of you. What he did hurt a lot, big time. I trusted him so much and he ruined it in a snap.” I ducked my head and chuckled humorlessly.

            I continued, “No matter what, I still care for him. What he did back there was too much and I’ll never forget it. I could forgive him, yes. But it will take a long, hard and impossible process. It could take months, years; I don’t know. Forgiving is something I could do yet I assure you, trust is something I could never give him back.”

            Carson nodded and pulled me closer to him, placing a kiss on my forehead; making me relax and forget all the pain for a while.

            “I understand.” He said softly, staring at me with his wonderful stormy gray eyes. “However, please don’t forget that I’ll protect you no matter what. Whoever and whatever it is from.” He smiled at me, making the room shine.

            I lied back down in bed, but I couldn’t sleep. I tossed and turned and it didn’t take long before I felt my bed sink and saw Carson lie down beside me. I gave him a confused look and he just wrapped his arms protectively around me.

            And that was everything I needed. Now, tomorrow, and forever.