"Welcome to lunch! Today's theme is surf and turf. Bon appetite!" Murphy explained.
"Thank you, Murphy." I smiled gratefully, taking a small amount of the bowl as it was passed.
"Mm, ceviche. Wait, why is there a little treasure chest in here?" Ravi asked.
"Oh, I must've scooped it up by accident when I was grabbing the goldfish," Murphy realized.
"Ew! My goats wouldn't eat this stuff, and they once ate our septic tank," Lou explained.
"Okay, okay, so you guys aren't fans of the surf. Perhaps you'll find the turf acceptable," Murphy said, placing the tray on the table. "There you go. Some nice, healthy greens harvest fresh from the Camp Champion football field."
"Murphy, you can't seriously expect us to eat that," Xander complained.
"That's the fifty-yard line! That's the best cut of the field!" Murphy protested. "Listen, I'm doing my best. So, quit giving me carp!"
"If we had carp, we'd be eating it," Emma sighed.
"Fine. You hotshots—except you two—think you can do better than me, then you can make dinner for the campers tonight. You two can help judge," Murphy challenged.
"Cool." Griff smiled.
"I think we can, and we will," Ravi accepted.
"Finally, we'll have a decent meal around here," Lou agreed.
"We'll see. Oh, and since you guys aren't eating the turf, I'll help myself," Murphy said. "That weed killer gives it a real tang."
~~~
"We finally get to make a good dinner. Can I get a E-I-E-I-Oh, yeah!" Lou said excitedly.
"And a rousing huzzah," Ravi added.
"When you have a E-I-E-I-Oh yeah, you really don't need a huzzah," Lou said.
"But four cooks in the kitchen might be like... like... What's the phrase when there are too many cooks in the kitchen?" Emma asked.
"Too many cooks in the kitchen?" Xander offered.
"You literally just said it," I groaned at my sister's stupidity.
"Well, I think the Grizzlies should be in charge," Ravi started.
"The only thing that you've ever been in charge of is the reptile club. And that's because you were the only member," Emma snorted.
"That is not true." Ravi glared at her.
"Mrs. Kipling doesn't count," Emma added.
Ravi rolled his eyes. "Well, it just so happens, in middle school, I cooked for myself every day."
"That's because you kept getting your lunch money stolen," I said, making Griff snort.
"And I am still waiting for Zuri to apologize," Ravi replied.
"Well, I think the Woodchucks should be in charge. I once made dinner for one hundred," Lou gloated.
"Were they cows, Lou?" Xander asked.
"No... they were goats," Lou corrected him as we sat down on the benches.
"Hey, friends, family... Xander. Since you guys can't agree on who should prepare dinner tonight, why don't you have a competition? Like that show, Chopped?" Zuri suggested.
"Ooh, I love that snow! I talk about it all the time. Right, Xander?" Emma looked at him.
"All. The. Time," Xander said solemnly.
"So, let's do it! It'll be Woodchucks versus Grizzlies!" Lou said.
"It is on like chateaubriand!" Ravi challenged. "The Woodchucks are going to be humiliated on the Internet."
"Big talk from a guy who went viral by being chased up a tree." Emma snorted.
"That dog was vicious!" Ravi argued.
"It was an elderly Chihuahua," I reasoned, making Griff laugh.
~~~
"What are we doing?" Griff sighed as we sat at the table and watched the sides cook.
"Sit and watch, make sure they don't use ingredients they weren't given, and then we eat the monstrosities." I shrugged.
"I want you two to help with cooking the actual dinner afterwards, since you help ease the complaining," Murphy said quietly as he walked by.
"Of course, Murphy." I nodded, smiling.
~~~
"Okay, first we have Lou and Xander's dish," Zuri started.
"May cod help us," Murphy prayed.
"Okay, since the barbeque was overrun by rodents, I decided to combine my ingredients and make what I call Lou's Down Home Stew," Lou explained.
I took a forkful and almost forced it into my mouth. I immediately grabbed my napkin and held it to my mouth. I wasn't about to throw up, I was just prepared to spit it out.
"Leapin' lobsters, I can feel my taste buds dying!" Murphy cried.
"The inside of my mouth is peeling off." Zuri gagged.
"This tastes worse than the food at juvie," Griff mumbled to me.
"Eh, needs more pepper," Jorge said as I nodded in agreement with Griff.
"Okay, now that my sight's back, let's try Ravi and Emma's dish," Zuri moved on.
"My creation is a combination of shrimp parts, accented with ripe banana foam, and what I hope was a tomato," Ravi explained.
"Hit it, Svet!" Emma said proudly.
"Svetlana, play the death march, 'cause I think I'm gonna die!" Murphy explained as I held the napkin to my face again.
"It tastes like chemicals and low tide!" Zuri complained.
"Eh, needs more pepper." Jorge shrugged.
"I declare... all of you losers," Murphy stated.
"Hey! We worked hard on this meal," Emma protested.
"That's the sad part," I said.
"I say we let the campers decide," Xander suggested.
"Yeah! Okay, everyone, try my food," Lou agreed.
The campers took one bite and spit it out.
"Ha, now try mine." Ravi smirked.
The kids repeated the action.
"We win!" Lou declared.
"How do you figure that?" Ravi questioned.
"They spit yours further," Lou said.
"Okay, I think we all have to admit, our food was terrible," Emma reasoned.
So, now you see how hard my job is," Murphy pointed out. "Plus, you don't have to deal with Gladys jumpin' outta cabinets and grabbin' at ya."
"You're right, Murphy, and we're sorry." Emma nodded.
"Especially about the Gladys thing," Xander added.
"I appreciate that, kids. And I kinda thought this might happen, so..." Murphy whistled. "While you guys were sweatin' like a pig on a spit, I went into town with these two and used my friend's kitchen to make this."
"Murphy, this is amazing." Ravi smiled.
"Yeah, when I have enough money to buy ingredients, we can put together quite the feast." Murphy smiled at us.
"But how did you afford it?" Zuri asked.
"I used the camp's entire food budget for the rest of the summer. Also paid off my scooter," Murphy explained. "Hey, I had to get the food here somehow. So, enjoy it! Because from here on in, the food is going to get even worse!"
أنت تقرأ
Military Freak
قصص الهواة"That's juvie freak to you." A Griff Jones x Reader story. Two kids, both juvenile delinquents. When they were separated, they were put on different paths. What happens when they reunite?
