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You woke up, gasping for air after getting yet another nightmare. Being the light sleeper that she was, she woke up with you.
"Another nightmare?"
"They kept getting worse, Kuvira. Each night that passes, they keep getting more detailed. It's almost like I did all those things." You turned to face her with tears in your eyes. "They're not a figment of my imagination are they? Whatever I keep having a nightmare about, it actually happened?"
Kuvira wasn't sure what to say. She had kept what happened from you for so long. It had been months since it happened. You had been fine at the beginning but something had triggered your brain to start remembering bits and pieces of what happened in the form of nightmares.
"(y/n), what happened is in the past. There's no need to dwell on it."
"Tell me what happened after I got out of the train. I saved you but how?"
Kuvira sits up with her knees draw up to her chest. She looked straight ahead, unable to look at you. She wasn't sure how you were going to react after what she had done to protect you.
"You blood bended everyone but me and our soldiers. I had to knock you out because you couldn't snap out of your trance."
"How many?"
You asked as you looked down at your hands, imagining the blood that you had spilled. Your voice lacked any emotion and it worried, Kuvira. She turned to face you, attempting to hold your hands but you pulled them back.
"It doesn't matter. What matters is that you saved me"
You looked up at her, your face void of any emotion. Kuvira stared at you, trying to figure out what you were thinking.
"How many did I kill, Kuvira?"
"I'm telling you that it doesn't matter. Why do you want to know how many you killed?"
"Dammit, Kuvira! Just tell me how many I killed!" You couldn't control your emotions anymore. You weren't sure whether to be angry at your self or angry with Kuvira for keeping something like that from you. Unable to control your emotions, you accidentally bended her blood. It had been for just a fraction of a second but it was enough to hurt her. "I'm sorry! I...I didn't meant to."
"It's okay, (y/n). I'm okay. Take a deep breath for me." You do as you're told, feeling a little calmer. "From what I heard, they counted 20 something. I didn't get an exact number."
Kuvira attempts to hug you but you move away. You ignored the hurt look she gave you when you rejected her attempts to comfort you. You had gotten careless and ended up killing people.
"I need to go, Kuvira. No one is safe around me. I should've never left. They warned me that I wasn't ready and I didn't listen."
You climbed out of bed and start changing out of your pajamas.
"What do you mean? This was an accident. You can't blame yourself. Please don't go."
"An accident doesn't kill 20 people!"
You yell at her. She climbs out of bed and blocks the entrance, refusing to let you go.
"I was hurt! You only did it to save me. I don't blame you for what happened. I didn't want to tell you because I was afraid that this would happen! I'm not afraid of you, there's no reason for you to leave. Please, (y/n). Don't go."
You didn't want to leave but you didn't want to risk killing more people accident. This time it hadn't been Kuvira or anyone that you cared about but there was no telling if it happened again. You would never forgive yourself if you accidentally killed someone that you cared about.
"I need to go, Kuvira. You're not safe around me. I could kill you without realizing it. Please. This is for your own good."
Kuvira refused to budge from the door. She wasn't going to lose you.
"No. I'm not letting you leave me. We can figure something out."
You weren't thinking rationally. All you were thinking about was leaving and putting as much distance between you and Kuvira. It was for her own safety.
"Then you leave me no choice. I am sorry, Kuvira. I love you but this is the only way I can keep you safe. I hope you can forgive me."
"What are...."
She couldn't speak, she couldn't move until you made her walk away from the door and to the bed. You could see the hurt in her eyes as you blended her blood but that didn't stop you.
"I truly am sorry but I don't want you to be someone I accidentally kill."
You walked out the door and released her until you had put some distance between the two of you. Once she was able to move, Kuvira just curled into a ball and cried herself to sleep as she held your pillow.
