still friends?

thirty-six

A/N: There's so much going on in this book right now and it's almost done haha. I don't know wtf I'm doing.

TW: Talk of homophobia and homophic slurs. Mentions of death.

Billie POV

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"I need to talk to Millie," she sniffled.

"No, you don't," I shook my head, walking onto the porch and closing the front door.

"I promise I'm not mad at her or anything, I have a lot of explaining to do and it will make sense once she hears what I have to say."

"You serious? You literally told her she was a faggot and she was living a sin,"

"I didn't mean it. Please let me explain," she pleaded with teary eyes.

"Stay here," I demanded. She nodded her head, sitting down on the porch swing as I walked back inside.

"Who was it?" My dad asked.

"Umm, It's your mom, M," I hesitated.

"My mom?" she asked with a shaky voice.

"I can get her to leave if-"

"No, I want to see her," she cut me off, pushing her chair away from the table and getting up quickly.

"You want me to come?" I asked with uncertanty, unsure of how this will go. I just want to protect Millie at all times but I also understand her wanting to do this alone.

"I'll be fine," she assured me as she walked to the front of the house.

Millie POV

I walked out of the front door, a breathe hitching in my throat when I saw my mom in tears sitting on the bench swing. She looked nothing like herself. She used to always seem so happy but right now she looks beat up. Her eyes swallen, her face blotchy, her hair a mess.

"Mom?" I whispered, feeling a tear begin to stream.

"Millie," she breathed out, standing from the swing and instantly wrapping her arms around me.

I melted into the hug, realizing how much I truly missed her without knowing it. Sometimes when you reconnect with people you realize how much you actually missed them after bottling it up for so long.

"What are you doing here?" I asked with a shaky voice. This day is so odd, one I never ever saw coming in a million years.

"I wanted to explain everything."

"Okay," I sighed, sitting down on the swing as she sat next to me. I'm ready to hear her out as long as she doesn't cuss me out; I want to have a civil conversation.

"Your father and I never saw eye to eye when it came to certain things; for example, the lgbtq+ community. I never saw a problem with it. I do believe in God, but not a god that would hate on someone he created. I have never seen the problem in two of the same genders loving each other," she sighed, running a hand through her tangly hair.

"This debate never came up until you were five. You wanted to wear one of Cam's old shirts but your dad refused to let you. That night we had a long discussion and he convinced me to see it his way, he brainwashed me into acting a certain way. It wasn't brought up again until we drove past a pride parade and he reminded me of his opinions and beliefs, you were twelve when that happened. Then you came out and I was horrified because I didn't know what he would do. After being brainwashed for so long, I lashed out at you. I didn't want him to do something bad to you so I took it into my own hands, it didn't help. That night, I explained how I felt about the situation. I never wanted you to leave, I wanted you to feel safe and accepted. Your dad..." she took a deep breath, choking back her tears as I watched her every move. "Your dad, he hit me for the first time, and it hasn't stopped since. When Cam approached him about the situation, everything got worse. He explained that he felt victimized, that his whole family was against him. He even took my phone and smashed it, he refused to get me a new one. We share our money so if I went and bought one, he would have noticed. Today he hurt me worse than he ever has and I left."

I sat in silence, in shock at the words I had just heard. I knew he was capable of things after he hit me, but I never thought he would touch mom. Their relationship always seemed so perfect to me, I never would have known this was going on. It just goes to show how much people can hide.

"I...how am I supposed to know this is all true after what you said to me?" I asked, still trying to process all the new information. She lifted her shirt slightly, displaying a huge blue and purple bruise covering the side of her stomach. I threw my hand over my mouth, trying to hold back tears.

"I'm so sorry," I sniffled.

"None of it is your fault," she put her shirt back on, "I'm not here for you to feel bad for me or pity me. I should have left him the first time I saw a red flag. I was the one who made a stupid decision. You have nothing to be sorry for my beautiful Millie. I saw you and Billie went public, Brad got worse after that. He thought his reputation would be shattered."

I can't remember the last time she reifered to him as 'Brad'. It's weird to hear her call him 'your dad' or 'your father', it used to just be 'dad'.

"So...what now?"

"I'm going to drive up and explain everything to Cameron. I'll get a hotel until I can find a cheap apartment."

"Do you know he has cancer?" I hesitated.

"Your dad told me," she nodded sadly.

-

After explaining everything to Billie I took a shower and pulled out my sketchbook as she went to shower after me.

I smudged the charcoal onto my sketchbook, hearing the door crack open. I gave Billie a sad smile before she closed the door and sat next to me. I shut my sketchbook as she kissed my cheek.

"What are you'drawing?" She asked softly.

"Umm, what I saw the night I found Sky," I explained hesitatnly.

"Can I see?"

"I guess," I mumbled, opening the book back up and passing it to her.

I stared at the drawing, just now realizing how morbid it was. I can't get the image of her unconscious body out of my head. I needed to put it on a piece of paper. Finding a lifeless body is something I never thought would happen; and now that it has, the sight doesn't stop circling my thoughts.

She shut the book slowly and stared at me with concern wrapped behind her expression. She was about to open her mouth but I spoke before she could, "Don't worry about me please. I just couldn't get that image out of my head and I needed to put it down somewhere. I promise I'll be okay."

"I know you don't want me to worry about you, but I am. Loosing a friend, or anyone for that matter, is hard; especially when you're the one to find them. You're grieving and I want you to know that I'll be with you every step of the way, okay? Please talk to me and don't be afraid to tell me the darkest things that are going on in you head."

I nodded my head before she pulled me in for a kiss. When her lips are against mine, it feels like every dark and evil thing has left earth and the only thing there is, is Billie and I.

"Want to talk about your mom more?"

"Not now, I'm tired" I yawned.

Without another word, she covered both our bodies with a blanket and laid down on her back, holding out her arms for me. I laid my head on her chest and intertwined our legs as she wrapped her arms around me securely. I felt her lips kiss the top of my head before she whispered an "I love you." I closed my eyes, holding back the tears that were threatening to fall as she rocked me gently to sleep.

A/N: Another kinda short chapter. Sorry...kinda. At least I'm updating every day!

Anyway, how do we feel about Millie's mom?