Her Secret Urges - Sombre nights - Book 1

Chapter 60 - Always in my heart

It was a long day at work thankfully, so Jane did not have much time to dwell on her sorrow, as she was too busy dealing with her work and several appointments. Alek's team had reached out with a proposal which was great news, but it also meant they had a lot of documents to prepare before they could sign the contracts. Cain's assistant had reached out also, with his calendar for next week, so that Jane could make an appointment with the wedding planner, but that was the last thing on her mind. She had received a text from Cain, saying that he had safely landed in Abu Dhabi and she had just replied to him when Alek called her to tell her he would be in front of HG in twenty minutes.

She turned off her computer and said goodbye to Luna, who gave her a long hug and told her that she loved her and that she could call her to come over at any time. Of course, Luna would remember the day of the accident, she was her best friend. She walked out of HG just as Alek was pulling over.

"Hop in," he said with a large smile. He was in his black sports car, driving himself instead of asking Antonio to drive them, as Cain would have.

"Hey," Jane said with a shy smile as she sat next to him.

"Hi L.J.," Alek smiled. "I hope you don't mind going with my car. I always prefer to drive myself around, especially in this car."

"Of course, it's a nice car."

"You still have no clue about cars, don't you?"

"None," she laughed.

"I won't hold that against you."

"So very kind of you."

"Indeed. Your parents' house then?"

"Yeah. You have to take..."

"I remember the way, don't worry," he winked at her.

"OK, then. How was your day?" she asked, as he started the car and drove in the right direction for now.

"Long. I really don't like stepping in for Cain and his meetings, it's just so boring. You?"

"I bet," Jane laughed. "I had a long day too. On top of my usual work, I have to prepare a lot of documents for this creepy guy who is giving us a lot of money but is also creating a ton of extra work for me."

"Tell him to fuck off," Alek laughed, knowing full well she was talking about him.

"I should do that," Jane laughed too. "Thanks again for the funds, it's going to make a huge difference for us."

"Don't mention it! You deserve it," Alek said, squeezing her hand for a moment before grabbing hold of the changing gear again. "You should be proud of your work, it's an amazing organisation."

"Thanks, Alek."

"You're welcome, L.J.! Did you manage to talk to your parents?"

"Yeah, I called them this morning. Don't worry about them," Jane replied dismissively.

"Well, I brought them a very nice bottle of scotch to turn them around."

"That will definitely help." They both laughed.

"I still have a few nice bottles from my dad's collection, and I remember your parents both liked scotch; so why not try to get on their good side."

"Good idea! Though my dad was super glad you were coming."

"While your mom yelled at you for bringing me over?" Alek added smiling.

"Something like that," Jane said unhappily, remembering how enraged her mother had been when she heard Jane was going to bring Alek over.

"I can't say I don't agree with her," Alek said after a moment.

"I can! I don't agree with her, " she was so mad that it was almost funny. They smiled at each other before she continued, "It's not your fault that I got pregnant and it's definitely not your fault that we were in an accident, so her anger toward you is not justified."

"It's not just that, she also hates me for coming back and trying to separate you from Cain," he said slowly.

"You are not to blame for that either. If I didn't want to be separated from Cain, then nothing would be able to, not even you. Stop thinking like that and taking the blame for everything. I'm in this too and just as much to blame, if not more."

"Hey, let's leave it for now, we're almost there anyway."

"Yeah..."

Alek parked the car in the driveway in front of her parents' house. The lights were turned off, so her parents had kept their word and had gone to the bar nearby for an hour or so, giving them some privacy. Alek picked up the bottle of scotch from the back seat and they walked together to the front door. Jane let them in and turned on the lights on their way. Alek left the bottle of scotch on the kitchen counter and they walked outside to the garden. On their right, at the edge of the garden was a large maple tree with a wide trunk, but barely any leaves left as it was the middle of November. They walked silently in the cold, holding hands. Jane had turned on the lights in the garden, but it was still slightly dark under the maple tree.

"Here it is," Jane whispered, touching the engraving she and her dad had made nine years ago. The engraving said, Always in my heart, and the date of the accident.

Alek touched the engraving with his free hand, still holding on to Jane's hand with the other. "Always in my heart," he read. "It's beautiful," he whispered in a broken voice.

"Yeah," she agreed, looking at his pale face. Then she turned to the engraving, her fingers touching the rough lines. She could not believe it had been ten years already! It felt like it had happened yesterday, though she knew ten years had gone by, because she missed her baby too much. "Hey baby boy, my baby," her voice broke, "I miss you more than I can say." A tear fell from her eyes, and then another, but she did not bother to brush them off.

Alek let go of her hand and wrapped his arm around her waist, needing to feel her closer to him. "My son," he whispered, his other hand on top of Jane's on the engraving. "I love you, son," he whispered as he too started to cry.

They fell on their knees, their bodies holding on to each other as they cried silently. Alek touched the earth under them reverently, as it was where Jane had buried their son's ashes, hoping he could grow big and strong with the help of the maple tree. It was impossible to say how long they cried nestled against each other, their bodies had gone so cold, they could not feel them anymore, as their hearts bled for their son.

"Thank you for bringing me here, L.J.," Alek whispered as their tears had dried out from the cold. "Thank you for allowing me to be next to my son and his mom today..."

"Thank you for being here with us," Jane whispered.

"We should go back inside or we'll both catch a cold."

"Yeah..."

Another long moment passed before they found the strength to stand up. "Always in my heart," Alek whispered, touching the engraving again.

"Always in my heart," Jane repeated too.

They walked back to the house silently and Alek closed the door behind them. They saw they were not alone anymore, as Jane's parents were sitting on the couch in the living room.