All A Joke (Eren X Reader) {Modern AU}

\39/

"Ok... I don't like that you are with Eren. I don't see why you are with him. He's been bullying you for a while. Mikasa has been pushing you around more lately. And you think that just cause you and Eren are dating its going to stop? He's only ever hurt you and he's only going to hurt you. Things don't change Y/N. What do you even see in him? Its not fair! Even after he stood you up and caused you to stay in bed for a weekend moping around you still go to him. After him doing things without thinking about your feelings, what the hell. How come you still look towards him? I'm the one that has been gentle with you? I've been going at your pace. I was there for you when he stood you up, when he drove over that puddle really fast, when he came over and scared you. Y/N ive been there but all your attention goes to Eren. That's not fair." Jean was basically shouting. He sounded like there was a mixture of anger and hurt in his voice.  He seemed like he was bottling it all up.

It did hurt my heart. Jean had been there for me when I was crying, when I was hurting, and when I was moping.

Unfortunately, I didn't see him any more than a friend. If that his intentions of trying to mske me see when he cane over.

"Jean I-" I started but got interrupted by Jean.

"Nothing you say can make me feel any different Y/N. Whether that be about you or your relationship with Eren. I don't see it fit. He caused you to hurt but yet he found a way to get to you. What if he just doesn't have pure intentions? What if he just wants to sleep with you and then leave you?"

"Its not like that! At least I don't think it is." I said to him.

"You think or you know?  You had high hopes that he would meet you at that restaurant but he ended up not showing up. You can't be for sure Y/N. This is just blowing my mind. How can you let him in like Th at? You don't even know him god damn it." He said sounding disappointed.

"Its not like that! He's been really sweet to me. Very apologetic as well. I've really enjoyed the time I've spent with him. He's opened up to me and I've opened up to him. It's different. We laugh and joke about things together. He seems really genuine about wanting to be with me. He does things at my pace now. He hasn't forced any thing on me. And I don't see that he will end up doing that." I said starting to get stressed.

"There's no saying he wont go back to his old ways. Just because it seems like he's opening up to you doesn't mean it's genuine. What if he just sees you as a joke? Then what do you do? You'll get sad again and who knows how many days you'll end up staying in bed. I know I said I'll accept any decision you decide to make, but this one I can't. I don't see it as right. I'm not going to support the decision that only puts you in harm's way." He said to me. He stood up and headed for the door.

"Maybe if I had bullied you too then you would have noticed me. I kept pushing myself away from Eren when he started picking on you because it wasn't funny to me. But maybe I should have stayed around. Maybe you'd develop feelings for me like You did for him... I'll see you around Y/N" Jean said as he exited out my room.

I sat in my room and just stared at nothing. Those words hurt me. You don't say that to people. You just don't.

I didn't know Jean felt any type of way for me. I didn't feel the same way but I didn't know. I really only saw him as a friend.

I didn't appreciate him getting upset with me over this. I really wanted Him to be supportive of this All.

I heard our front door open and close. There was no slam but I knew that Jean had left already.

It hurt.

I believed in Eren. I believed that he wouldn't try and hurt me again. I had faith in him.

I did like him. And I believe that he actually liked me as well.

With the way Eren had been acting towards me lately, its not fake. I know it's not. That has to mean something. I just know it does.

Jean looked really upset with me.

I didn't like that.

I thought we were supposed to be friends. Friends that accept each other. Friends that support each other.

I think I just lost Th at friend.

He meant a lot to me. He was there for me when things got hard. When the bullying started he was there to see if I was ok. He even got into a fight not too long ago cause of me.

Its just so dumb. How can I be dumb.

And I can't even control my own feelings.

I'm aware my mom heard the whole conversation. Jean had been a little loud at times.

Then again Jean had the same view on this relationship that my mom did. She would only call me dumb if I went out of my room.

I got up, closed the door to my room and went to lay on my bed.

I texted Eren.

Me- Are you doing anything tonight?

3 minutes later he responded.

Eren- I have no plans. Why what's up?

Me- I want to get out of here.

5 minutes later my phone buzzed.

Eren- I'll pick you up in an hour buttercup. :)

I smiled softly. And felt my eyes water.

Then I felt overwhelmed.

I didn't eant to feel this way. I got up and tried cleaning up around my room.

I picked an outfit for going out with Eren.

I needed to keep myself occupied so I didn't just lay in bed wallowing.

Maybe spending time with Eren will make me feel better.

Hopefully that's how it goes.