Love Twist With A Teacher: Book 1(HP/Severus Snape Fanfic ReUpload{CURRENT EDIT}

Chapter 22: Snape's Realization and News of Hurt

~ Snape's POV ~

*When Snape Left The Bathroom After Finding Miranda*

Not being to contain myself, I turned around and left the room with Miranda and the others there.

I didn't want them or her to see me cry as it was the last thing I needed to destroy my reputation. I couldn't let anyone bear to see me get weak. I know it was heartless to leave her that way, but I just couldn't stay any longer. I couldn't stand to see her that way and deep down, it really bothered me. I cannot bloody believe she cut herself and got like that and I didn't even bother to even go check on her. 'Probably 'cause your one of the reasons why she cut herself you moron,' is what my mind said to me as I got to my personal room and sat in my chair. I did feel sorry for Miranda because she doesn't have a dad or a stepfather anymore.

I know it seems like I don't care at all, but deep down...I do. She doesn't really even have much of anyone family-wise besides Granger's mother and Granger herself. But the way she looked when I saw her lying on the bathroom floor was heartbreaking. Blood was all over her arms, her eyes were baggy and red like she didn't sleep much and crying too much, and I could tell she hasn't eaten a meal in a couple of days. I'm kind of surprised she hasn't been that hungry enough to go and eat a meal. When I last saw her a couple of days ago in the hallway, I knew I was getting out of control. I didn't realize it at that proper moment, but as time has gone by, I have realized that.

Now, I also regret saying some of the things I said to her then; like when I said I loved Lily all my life more than I can ever love her. In a way, that wasn't fully true though because I have grown to have deep feelings for Miranda; more than I felt towards Lily at one point. I'll always have love and care for Lily Potter, always, but the way I've come to feel for Miranda is nothing like I've ever experienced before. I also didn't currently like the idea of Miranda dating Potter. I thought they were just friends, so why would she go to him? My jealousy got even worse when I saw her and that insolent brat holding hands at lunch too.

I was getting jealous and fuming as I had tried hard to control myself. This was while I had known that Miranda kept staring at me. I knew right away then she felt and saw what I was feeling from the constant staring and I was trying to hide it. I knew completely that it was bad and wrong to forcefully kiss her and all that with her friends around, but I couldn't help myself. I felt that another part of me was saying to do it anyway and didn't care about the consequences that would cause. It was almost like that moment wasn't really me at all; a different part of me that's unknown. But yet at the same time....her lips felt so good to me and always do when I kiss her.

The way her body looked and her breasts so firmly placed that was growing with age. Her curved, young body that makes the shape look almost like an hourglass. The way she smiles all the time and that light laugh I could hear from a mile away. And those blue puppy dog eyes that get me lost and hypnotized. She's almost petite for her size and the way her red hair flows when she walks. The way her behind looks as she moves, not big in size, but also not flat or small; attractive for anyone to notice if they stare long enough. Her lips are always planted nicely, looking so soft all the time that it makes me just want to kiss her forever......

Ugh, NO!

I have to stop thinking like this and acting this way. It is bad for me and inappropriate for a teacher like me who has a crush on a student of mine; wanting to date her. At the same time, like Albus says, love is love and if two people have a connection, that cannot be denied. In a million ways it can be wrong altogether to be with her. Besides, I am also too old for her as I'm twice her age and dangerous to be around. I already hurt her once badly in the past, who says I can't accidentally do it again? Yet, deep inside my mind, I knew that Miranda wasn't just a student to me. Somehow I keep saying one thing and thinking or doing the opposite of what I truly feel.