Not A Second Time (John Lennon Fanfic)

Chapter 22.

I sat awkwardly at the table, my hands in my lap as John and his aunt argued in the kitchen. Julian sitting next to me. He placed his hand on mine, making me smile.

"Alright so let's just get down to the chase, no beating around the bush. You and John are married yes?" His aunt came into the room and sat at the table, looking at me.

I nodded as John sat next to me. "Yes ma'am. It was a quick, small ceremony. Paul was there. He told us he phoned you."

"He phoned me yes. It's just when he told me whom he was marrying, I hung up."

"Oh." I looked down and began eating. John sighed.

"Do ye 'ave to be so harsh to her?" John set his fork down.

"I'm not being harsh am I? No. I'm just being honest. You of all people should know how I am John."

"Pssh. Yeah I do. Sadly." He muttered the last part. I place my hand on John's arm and gave him a look. He nodded and turned to Mimi.

"...I'm sorry Mimi."

She just nodded and began to eat. It was silent in the room as we ate our dinner. Julian giggling here and there, playing with his kitten, feeding her food. I wiped his mouth with a napkin.

"Come on baby eat your food." I said.

"But she's hungry." He pouted.

"She ate plenty before we came. Now you're just making her fat. Do you want a fat lazy kitty that just sleeps and doesn't want to play anymore?" I asked, poking his tummy. He giggled and shook his head.

"Okay then. No table scraps for Lucy. Finish up." I kissed the top of his head. He scooted closer to me and nestled in my lap. John smiled watching us.

"You really have a way with children Lucy. Last time we met, you said children were far from what you wanted." Mimi said, setting her fork down.

I looked at her and shrugged. "I was a kid then. Things changed after um...I lost my first."

"Lucy we don't need to talk about this." John placed a hand on mine.

"What do you mean? You miscarried?" Mimi asked. John spoke.

"Please Mimi we don't need your cruel comments."

"No John it's fine. To answer your question Mimi, Yes. I um, miscarried. The first time was in Hamburg, my last time, about a year ago. I can't have children."

"Well, we've been trying..." John interrupted.

"John I can't. I know you want another child but, I can't give you one. We've been trying for what seems like forever now and my body just wont work. I'm broken." I said, tears welling up in my eyes. John leaned over and pulled me in his arms. I cried into his shoulder as he rubbed my back.

"Wait a minute. Hamburg? John, please tell me Lucy wasn't in Hamburg with you while Cynthia was here, living under my roof." Mimi said angrily. John pulled away and sighed.

"Mimi, now isn't the time."

"Then when? You knew how I felt about Lucy John. Cynthia stayed here for months, writing letters, calling every night, going back to school so she could better her life. And where were you? Off goofing around in Hamburg, shacking up with...this!?" She pointed at me. I bit my lip and sniffled.

"It wasn't like that!" John yelled back.

"Tell me John. Were you sleeping with her?"

"Mimi..."