BACK TO LOVE.

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Ayanda covered the meal she had prepared for her husband, put it in the warmer and sat down on the well prepared dinner table with a glass of wine. The children were away at their grandparents for the weekend and she took this opportunity to sit down with him and talk. By eleven o'clock the wine bottle was empty and Axel had yet to make it home.

' Fuck this.'

She threw the wine glass at the wall and it shattered into pieces. Axel had been coming home late frequently since she stepped out of the guest room and this made her even guiltier than before. Her insecurities, which she was trying so hard to overcome resurfaced and she felt more like a failure each day. Which made her want to abandon the idea of talking to him.

' Who would want to come home to a woman who couldn't take care of her children. '

She mumbled to herself as she walked into the main bedroom and got into bed. Forty minutes into her sleep, she heard the front door open and close but fell asleep immediately after before feeling her husband's cold hands wrap around her waist.

' I made breakfast.'

' I'm coming.'

She got out of bed and headed into the bathroom to attend to her hygiene before joining him in the kitchen.

' I am sorry about last night. I was held up in meetings all day and unfortunately forgot that you had this dinner planned for us. Do you mind if after breakfast we can talk. My first meeting today is at eleven and I will be leaving for it from here.'

Ayanda recited in her head the whole speech she had prepared the night before. They sat opposite each other, she did not think it would be this hard to speak to her husband of seven years.

' First I would like to thank you for supporting me and being my strength through all that we have been through. I know I haven't been pleasant to be married to or be around. I've let my anger and frustration get the best of me, and for that, I am truly sorry. I never meant to hurt you or make you feel less than. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. I want to apologize for not being a better partner to you. I know that I've neglected your needs and our relationship. I haven't been there for you emotionally, and I haven't shown you the love and care that you deserve. I also want to acknowledge that I haven't been fully present in our marriage. I've allowed the stresses of life to consume me, and I've neglected to prioritize our relationship. I promise to make more of an effort to be present, to listen, and to understand your needs."

Ayanda got down on her knees and knelt before her husband who quickly helped her up. He wiped the tears on her cheeks and pulled her in for a hug, which lasted for a few minutes.

' Aya, there is nothing to forgive. I did what a husband is supposed to do, support and love his woman. What kind of man would I abandon you in your time of need?'

Ayanda looked up at him, tears welling in her eyes.

"I should've been there for you, just as you were there for me. I was so consumed by my own guilt and grief that I couldn't see what you were going through."

Axel kissed her forehead gently.

"We both made mistakes. What's important is that we're here now, recognizing our shortcomings and willing to mend what's broken between us."