Another Shot at Love

Chapter 30- New year

It was the first day in 2018. A new year, a new month and a new day but Kunbi felt everything but new. He was up late the previous night to celebrate the New Year with Tess and after Tess had hugged him and kissed him happy New Year, he went to call his family. He had just ended the call with Bill who had just proposed to Tracey when he thought of calling Kemi. Kunbi deliberated his decision over a drink but it didn't seem like a good idea. He considered sending a text but that would seem cowardly so he brushed the idea aside as quickly as it came. The only choice he had left was to send an email to Kemi. The emails she never responded too. Even if it bothered him a lot when she didn't reply his mail, Kunbi felt better just typing out his feelings and sending it out to Kemi.

He went to his Gmail and opened a fresh dialogue only that he didn't know what to write or how to even start the mail. What will make this one different? After all he was sure Kemi never read any of his mails. Or maybe she did and chose to ignore it. Kunbi thought and gulped the drink before heading upstairs. He felt light headed and could only do little before he collapsed on the bed at 4:25 am.

He looked at Tess who was already asleep and then at the white ceiling of his house. He felt lost and empty. "God, I know I don't even deserve to come before you. I have messed up so many times. I have even taken your love for granted over and over again. But please.... Just this once. Help me and save me." He could feel the heavy hand of sleep grab him and as he surrendered to sleep, he sent one more distress call. Just this once God.

Kunbi woke up at 12:46pm, at least that was what his bedside clock read when he opened his eyes. The sun was bright and it glared harshly at Kunbi that he had to roll over and shut his eyes until the headache he felt subsided to a dull ache at the front of his skull. Kunbi laid back in bed for a few extra lazy minutes before he got out of bed with a groan. The house was quiet and Kunbi wondered where Tess had gone to, in the meantime he was grateful for the alone time he had and exploited it by taken a hot shower. Kunbi got dressed in a polo t shirt, sweat pants and a simple palm slippers as he went in search of Tess. He was hungry and they had to attend a dinner at his parent's house that evening. Kunbi desperately wished he could get out of the dinner but his mum had made it clear that there was no way out. He descended the stairs while whistling until he heard two people talking in hushed voices. Kunbi let his curiosity get the better of him and approached the kitchen cautiously. Who was Tess talking to? And why were they whispering? As he got closer to the door he could catch snippets of their discussion.

"I feel so bad Isioma." Tess was saying. Kunbi stood still to the side of the kitchen door listening.

"I feel like I am imprisoning him."

"What do you mean?"

"When I look at him I don't see love or desire anymore. Unlike before, Kunbi did things because he wanted to do them and because he wanted to make me happy. Right now he does them because he has to do them. Like it is some job."

Kunbi shut his eyes in remorse. Tess was not happy and it was all his fault. She was the mother of his child and she had done nothing but love him unconditionally. He was about to ditch his spying spot when Isioma spoke up.

"How is his reaction towards... you know, the baby."

Kunbi heard Tess sigh audibly followed by the clanging of the spoon and pots an indication that she was cooking.

"He loves the baby. I know he does. He always ask how I am feeling and normally places his hand on my stomach to talk to the baby. He says it's never too early to start talking to his baby. The problem is, it's not his baby." Tess said with evident frustration.

"Shh! Keep your voice down. Isn't Kunbi in the house?"

"I know he is sleeping. Drank himself stupid last night and I know it is because of Kemi."