Under the Gray Willow Tree

Chapter 33

The two of us never really got to present the project after all, though we completed it. The sibling's left town that Sunday as their parents had got a better job offer or something like that in the next town and something about having relatives living there as well?

So, the Lit teacher, being kind as she was, told me to either do a comic or an essay or the PowerPoint presentation to hand in, and that I didn't need to present it in front of the class, which comes as a relief to me as I am not very good at presentations. Naturally, I chose comic.

And as of right now, I am a loner in school. I may know a couple of people, and a couple of people might know me, but we're not close enough to hang out so very often. So, it's just that occasional wave and smile in the hallway. That's our relationship.

However, I don't really mind the limited attention. I am deliberately separating myself from the social world. I don't want to mix with anyone anymore. Everyone I seem to get close with goes away. I don't want that to happen anymore.

I just don't feel that sense of security anymore.

I just feel so vulnerable to the people around me.

I feel so... Unsafe...

I guess there's really nowhere to run anymore, huh Willow? Everything is just too much. And trouble always follows, no matter where I run. I can never get away from the things I want to get away from, no matter how far I run to.

I used to think that even though I am almost alone in the world, that I will never be truly alone. And that there will always be someone by my side. But I guess that that's just proved wrong isn't it? I am truly alone in the world right now. With no one with me anymore.

Maybe all this is fate? Maybe all this is who I am meant to be? But whatever it is, I don't really like it. But I guess I can't really understand God's perfect plan for us. He has the perfect plan for each and every one of us. I am sure this is part of it. Either that or it's a test.

Either way, I know that I can go through all of these with the strength that comes from the Holy Spirit, and from God. Human cannot live on our own strength alone, but on the strength that comes from the Spirit.

I sighed as I continued with the last of my English factual essay on water pollution. Nothing too hard. I can easily search for all of the information online, so it's not really that brain cracking. And I already finished what was left from the halfway-through comic that Jason had drawn.

I penned down the last sentence and stuffed the pile of inked paper into my file. There! I am all done! And I have no more homework. Insert forced smiley face here.

What should I do now? Should I paint or something? Maybe I should just draw or sketch... It's easier, and less messier, though I'm worse at it than painting... But I guess I shall just sketch out random things. Whatever works, I guess.

I feel like drawing a cartoon character. But normal cartoon characters are so easy to draw. Maybe I will just draw a Japanese anime character. Maybe I will just draw a Japanese anime character. Yeah... That shall do. No offence other cartoonist, but Japanese anime drawings are nicer, though yours is too.

I took out my sketchbook, my pencil case filled with different pencils and pens and another pencil case that is filled with copics, which are paintbrushes with ink in them so you don't have to manually use paint, but the disadvantage is that you can't really control how faint you want that particular colour to be.

I unzipped my pencil case and fished out a 2H pencil. I flipped open to an empty page and using my 2H pencil, began to draw. I started drawing faint lines for the outline of the face. Then slowly but surely, all the features of the face itself.