Under the Gray Willow Tree

Chapter 15

Trust me guys, when I say that it is not easy at all to try and get over someone – or rather, in my case, the guy – you really, really love with all your heart. I have been going around all week, alone, and trying, in vain, to avoid him, at all costs. But of course, that's impossible.

Want to know why? Well, it's because we have the same schedule and are bio and chemistry partners.

And right now, just so you all know, it's Monday. And I am going to try – most likely in vain – to avoid him. But you know what? It's impossible. So I am pretty much just going to give up on that. As I don't want to waste my precious time doing something that is futile.

The threats that I have been receiving from Desmond are not so scary anymore. Don't ask me why, but they just aren't. It's either he has stopped being so threatening, or I am getting immune to his many threats.

I really want to see all of this as a joke, a dream, a thought, maybe a nightmare. Anything but reality. But you know what? It's not. So, it pretty much sucks to be me right? Because all of this? It's all real. Like every other sad thing that has been happening in my even sadder life of mine. Because that's all that has ever happened to me anyway.

I got to class exceptionally early today. Since there's pretty much no point at all in lingering in the hallways with no one to talk to. And I also don't want to take the chance of leaving home later than my normal time, as I'm scared that I might be late for class.

I don't want to linger pointlessly in the hallways because I am just another loner of the school. But I don't really mind if people looks at me like that. Because I am trying to detach myself from the social world, which has only made me depressed. And also which I've successfully done for the past three years or so.

I sat down and grabbed a few notebooks out of my bag, along with a few coloured pens as well. Being an artist, I can't help but illustrate the notes that the teachers give us. And aside from doing that out of habit and for the fun of it, it actually makes it a whole lot easier to study during the exams as well.

I rested my head on my arm that was laid limply across the table. With the other free hand, I started drumming my fingers out of boredom. The wait was making me a little drowsy, so I closed my eyes for a while.

The whizzing of some object across my face is what startled me awake from almost falling asleep. I raised my head tiredly.

"Hey," someone said from beside me, in the direction of the launch of where the object flew from.

"Hi," I replied absent minded, a little too cheerfully at the same time as well.

I turned my head towards the sound of the voice. And that was when I realised who I was talking to.

"Hi," I repeated, this time, a lot more coldly and more tensed than the last time.

I was trembling a little, or rather, shaking, with anger.

He sighed from beside me and hurt flashed in his eyes. "You know, you have got to get over whatever happened that day. I am not going to hurt you Willow, I don't want to. I love you way too much to do so, and you know it."

I snorted. "Yeah right. I doubt you even have any feelings for me. How in the world am I supposed to get over the fact that my boyfriend is a murderer?" I almost shouted the last part.

He shot up quickly and muffled my voice by covering his hand over my mouth. "Shush. If you would just listen to me for one second, Willow. I can explain. You jump into conclusions way too quickly. You should do some research first."

I gulped, swallowing the lump that had been forming in my throat. Honestly speaking, he does have a point. A good one. And I also guess that I should not jump into conclusions so easily... I should give him a chance. After all, I have known him for about – give or take – three years.