Just Live For Me

Keeping Secrets Sucks

November 16, 2012

Dear Diary,

         Somehow I’ve managed to make it through a week of pretending to hate Jake. Believe me it’s no that easy. Do you know how many times I’ve wanted to run over to Jake and hug him and never let go? Well… A LOT! Especially today when Kevin elbowed him in the stomach before school. Thank god Jake’s ribs are basically healed. If I didn’t know that I would have put everything on the line and beat the shit out of Kevin. I had to walk by and pretend I hated Jake’s guts!

Thank god for two things. One is Casey (although she can be annoying); as soon as she saw Jake get elbowed she got me away from there. She pulled me into the girl’s bathroom and let me cry into her shoulder. I think that nobody has ever had a better friend than me. I’m gladder now than ever that I told her about Jake and me. Two was Jake’s dedication. When he hit the wall I could tell he was hurt (even though his ribs are almost better there is no way that didn’t hurt a lot). But even though I knew he wanted nothing more than to fall to the ground and let Kevin win, he knew me too well to do that. He knew that if he went down I’d run over to him in a heartbeat. If there’s one thing he would take Kevin’s shit for… it was me. I can’t help but be worried for his dedication, but thank god he has it. I have no idea what would have happened if everyone found out about us. Sure my friends would be happy for me, but I know my parents would find out. And when they did, all hell would break loose.

November 17, 2012

Dear Diary,

         Jake never showed up last night… I waited until 2 a.m. with my window open. I even went to sleep with it open just in case… but he never showed up… If this were a normal relationship I would just assume that he fell asleep or something, but with Jake… I dunno… anything is possible with him…

November 18, 2012

Dear Diary,

         Ok so, Jake didn’t show up again last night… I texted him a few times, but he didn’t respond. I was really getting worried so today I went to his house (his mom usually works on Sunday afternoons), but today she wasn’t.

Today I nearly walked in on Jake and his mom having a scream off. Thank god I didn’t just swing open the front door. I opened it a crack and heard glass break, so I nearly slammed it shut. Before I closed it I heard a woman scream. It was Jake’s mom. I peeked in and saw Jake standing there with broken glass everywhere, and his mom was just standing in shock. Then she shouted something that I couldn’t make out, but it seemed to make Jake really angry. He knocked some books off a table and shouted, “ Shut the fuck up bitch!” then she said something like “ How dare you talk to me like that! I’m your mother!” Then Jake shouted back “In what way are you my mother, Jill!? Did you help me when I needed it? No! Did you comport me after my sister’s death!? No! Jill you couldn’t raise shit!” Then Jake’s mom, or ‘Jill’ I guess started crying. Jake didn’t care. He was pissed at her, but I still have no idea what for. I left after about five minutes of endless shouting (I’m surprised they never caught me)

         I’m dying to know what Jill and Jake were yelling about… and why it made him so angry…