Merlin one shots

Funny conversations between Merlin and Arthur

Many are pinterest inspired. You can choose which is Arthur and which is Merlin as long as it doesn't say names. Comment on your favourites, and I could make a chapter about the most popular one. If you really like one, and want to make a story about it, go ahead. Just tell me the name of your book when it's made so I can read it.
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"Are you clinicaly insane or incredibly annoying?"

"I don't know probably both."

"I'm trying to have a Serious conversation with you!"

"And I'm trying to subtly avoid it!"

"I had a thought."

"Oh no."

"I swear it's a good one this time!"

"She's crying, what do I do?"

"Go comfort her,"

"How do I do that?"

"Start with hugs,"

"With what?"

"How do we always get into these situations?"

"Nine years of friendship, and I still don't know!"

"On a scale of one to ten, how bad do you think it would be if-"

"At least a twenty."

"No I said we're safer. Not safe."

"Its not my birthday."

"Its definitely your birthday."

"Give me a calendar and I'll prove- oh. Never mind. Happy birthday to me."

"I can't marry her! She'd kill me in a week!"

"But your fath-"

"Absolutely not. That's final."

"You are remarkably well behaved tonight."

"Thank you sire, I've been tryin-"

"What did you do."

"If we get arrested it's your fault."

"We have five people trying to kill us right now, what are we supposed to do?"

"Actually it's more like eight."

"Oh I'm sorry I wasn't specific enough!"

"Right now I don't know if I want to kiss you or push you off a bridge!"

"Can I pick?"

"Hold on, you died!"

"Yeah, well it didn't stick."

"The real treasure was the memory we just made."

"I almost died!"

"Ah, yes. That was my favorite part."

"Literally everything about this is illegal."

"Guess we better not get caught then."

"Youre crushing my spleen!"

"You don't even know where you're spleen is."

"What's in your backpack?"

"A Dragon egg."

"Real funny Merlin, now tell me what is it?"

Merlin racks his brain for an answer that is not the truth this time.