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Louis finally managed to pull himself up, after minutes spend on the cold floor, bawling his eyes out. His throat was hurting, almost burning. His mouth was dry, and he practically felt like a desert had appeared in his mouth-throat area. Dry tears stained onto his black adidas hoodie, and all the boy wanted to was disappear. He felt unwanted, his only friend being his boyfriend, had left him thinking he was a cheating scumbag.
Feeling the dizziness once he was on his shaky legs, Louis swallowed deeply, and inhaled shakily. The door to the stall opening when Louis unlocked it, and walked out of the bathroom.
When rounding the corner, he looked around, tears in his eyes, to see if anyone was around. When no one was around, or so he thought, he speed walked to his locker, to get his backpack.
Tears burning in his eyes, he was sure he must have looked like a mess. Quickly snapping his backpack from his locker, he slammed his locker. Turning on his heel, a little too quickly, he stumbled backwards when he walked into something hard. Slowly looking up, Louis was met with caring, concerned emerald eyes. Curls falling in his face, Harry bit his lip when he noticed the younger boy's glossy eyes.
"Are you okay? Have you been crying?" Harry quickly asked, voice filled with concern. His hand reaching out wanting to touch the younger boy, but quickly dropping it when remembering what happened Saturday night. Shaking his head, Louis gaze fell dead on the floor. "No, I'm fine, just tired, s'all" Louis lied, almost whispering the words. He wanted Harry to know everything, he wanted to tell him to hold him, he wanted him to calm him when he was crying his eyes out, he wanted him to worry when Louis was feeling suicidal.
But he couldn't, he was too afraid of getting hurt, yet all he wanted was to open up for Harry. His fingertips and lips were tingling, from being so nervous around Harry. He was afraid that he would get caught in his lie.
Nodding his head, Harry shifted on his feet, not fully convinced. Swallowing deeply, Louis kept his eyes on the ground, quietly gnawing on his nails, he felt it coming. He was shaking like a leaf, as he felt the words slip out of his lips. "Actually, I'm, uh, something happened in the-"
Being interrupted by the loud sound of someone calling Harry's name, Louis sighed and internally rolled his eyes. He had finally built up the courage to tell Harry, but was interrupted by Evan who was walking up to them. "I have looked everywhere for you! And then you're just here, talking to him," Evan exclaimed loudly, putting extra pressure on 'him', and walked up behind Harry and put his arms around the taller boy's waist.
Blinking rapidly, Louis felt his palms getting sweatier.
Well, I'm not with him, but we kissed a few times tonight.
He heard Evan's voice in his head, remembering what he told Zayn. Fresh tears burned in his eyes, biting down hard on his lip trying to hold them back. Was Evan lying? Were they together? Many questions were yet to be unsolved, but they were bugging Louis.
Harry didn't seem bothered by Evan's motions, the only one being uncomfortable was Louis. He felt left out, but it wasn't like it was anything new. Green eyes scanning Louis, practically trying to read him. "Uh, I should leave," Louis stuttered, almost stumbling over his own words. Eyes furrowing together, Harry wanted the boy to stay, but nodded anyways.
Walking fast towards the big doors, he wanted out. Crashing into the doors, not caring if he hurt his shoulder, he kept on walking until he felt like he could finally be alone, no risk of being caught. The only way he felt as he could abreact, was to let all his emotions out in tears. When the first tear broke free, the rest followed in an unbroken stream. He was shaken, and disappointed in himself. He couldn't believe he almost told Harry, what was he thinking?
He felt a new emotion, he had never felt before. He felt hatred for himself, he wanted to hurt himself.
