Blurry Vision ∷ Daredevil; Matthew Murdock

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Chapter 16

"Faster! Let's go!" Agent Romanoff shouts at a group containing myself and nineteen other agents.

This session consists of something we call Spider-Man push-ups. Imagine Spider-Man climbing up a wall, but make the wall horizontal. Now go the entire length of a basketball court and back, with a little push-up as you touch your right elbow to your right knee, and vice versa.

Sprinting as fast as we can across the gym, basketball court length again, and slamming ourselves into a padded wall, then repeat until someone rips a pad.

Jumping up a wall until someone touches the bell which is ten feet in the air.

Finally to finish warm up, sparring with wooden rods. You don't stop until someone breaks a stick.

Again, that's just warm up, you don't want to know the full training session.

Tolerance, that is a big thing you learn during training. Sure we wear pads and gloves, but tolerance towards others and towards the training officer. If you complain, we start everything over. We could be on the last set of wall jumps, but if someone says one thing, we go back to the push-ups.

Fuck we could be in the swimming pool swimming laps, but if someone mentions one thing about something- anything- we get out, get changed, and start doing push-ups.

There is no complaining.

No expressing an opinion.

It is 'Yes ma'am' or 'No ma'am'.

No 'ifs' 'ands' 'buts' or 'ors'.

There is no 'We did that already.'

There is no 'Can we take a water break?'

It is what it is, and if you disagree, you aren't cut out.

Welcome to the true side of SHIELD, it's the seventh circle of hell.

~~~~~

"Why didn't you tell me who Wade was?" Matt asks me, rather pissed off.

I almost start laughing, "Because it's none of your business?"

"He made it my business last night." He crosses his arms, attempting to look intimidating but it just further pushes me to laugh.

"No he didn't, and if anything..." I pause mid sentence to basically chug a water bottle, we didn't get a water break during our eight hours of training today, "And if anything, you are attempting to make it your business when it has nothing to do with you."

"Well you didn't exactly sound happy to see him." He points out. I roll my eyes and finish wiping down my guns.

"When do I sound happy to see anyone?" I ask him with a sigh. I walk out of my kitchen, past him, and over to a glass case holding my suit and weapons.

"You punched him in an alleyway."

"And we met how?"

"Ember! Will you stop arguing with me?" He grabs my shoulder and I move away from his touch immediately.

"DON'T- don't touch me.." I restrain my self from yelling and sigh instead, watching his face drift from frustrated to concerned.

"I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"

"If you are so curious about him, go ask him yourself. He'll probably be out trying to make a quick buck." I cut him off while stubbornly putting my guns into the case.

"Ember... I'm sorry." He trails off, taking a step towards me.

I don't look at him, instead I just stare at my mask. The edges made of magnets, the rest is a thick black leather covering the vibranium. Some small holes so I can breathe. Specifically tailored to my facial features. It's beautiful and sad at the same time. A craftsmanship that I hide behind.

"I doubt you would stand here if you knew how many lives I've took." I whisper while running my fingers across the mask. My mask.
I'm a mask.

"How many?" He asks, equaling his voice to mine.

"Over the last ten years... too many." My eyes start to sting with tears and my mind fogs up with too much though of faces..faces that no longer exist.

"We all do things that we regret, we just have to stop doing them to get better." He tells me.

"...but what makes me the monster, Matthew, I don't regret a single life I took."

Silence. Uneven breathing. And silence.

"I kill monsters, because I am one. I know how they think, I know what they do, and I don't want them out there. I don't want anymore monsters out there. Creating orphans, creating heartbreak, creating broken relationships. I'm fighting fire with fire, but can you blame me?" I turn around to face his stone cold face, with my own broken and tear stained one.

"I'm just an Ember within SHIELD's fire."