Blurry Vision ∷ Daredevil; Matthew Murdock

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Edited 1/23/2018

Chapter 1

The harsh cold wind of New York's winter blows against my skin, chilling me further.

I stare down at the old tomb stone with my mothers name etched into it.

Amelia Stella Madera. Mother, daughter, and wife.

It's so plain. So...bland. She deserved so much more written. So deserves so many more flowers.

And the small flag next to the tomb almost means nothing.

She served yes. She survived. But some asshole shot her! So why even have the damn flag? She didn't die in Iraq! She died here, in her home, by some asshole who doesn't deserve freedom.

I drop the bouquet of roses onto the grave, some of the petals scatter but it's fine. It looks beautiful this way.

She was beautiful...she used to tell me I was beautiful.

Now when I look in a mirror all I see is her... her eyes, her smile, her nose...everything.

I don't even realize I'm crying until the tears hit my boots.

"H-Hey mama." I speak out softly, before laughing at how petty I sound, "God, this would be the last thing you want from me huh? To be crying over your grave when it's five below freezing? But yet here I am."

Silence.

But honestly, did I really expect her to respond? After fifteen years I still expect her to respond? How stupid am I? This is pathetic.

"I got a new apartment...it's uh...nice? My neighbor is an old elderly woman and I think there is a blind guy in the building as well. I'm not sure...I just hear a lot of tapping every so often." I say softly, playing with the edge of my jacket, "I'm still working on getting my job back. SHIELD wants me to do a bunch of training things to make sure I'm still cut out to work there again."

This is so stupid, I shouldn't have come here. I wasted twenty dollars on a cab...

I remember something and dig through my pocket before pulling out a picture of my old dog, "This was Yogi... I had him through college. He was a German Shepard, the campus was trying to train him to be a police dog, but it turns out he was blind. So they gave him to the pound to be put down, but I got him before they could. He was nice, knew all sorts of tricks. People joked and said I was his seeing eye human..." Not that you care... you're dead. You've been dead for basically all my life. I've only known you for three years... I've spent more time with my college roommate then with you.

I tuck the photo away and stare back at the grave, "You would have liked him, he didn't bark ever and he didn't beg...you would have loved him." Or you might not have... what do I know? Last time I saw you I was ten.

My phone buzzes, indicating that I had to go home now... can't stay out too late. Can't risk anything happening to me just as I get here.

"Um...I love you okay," I start while taking a very shaky breath in, "I didn't know you very well, and y-you left me with... with him- but you didn't know that he would..." I trail off, my eyes drifting back up to the darkening New York sky, "I'm sorry, mama... I'm so sorry."

The one thing I didn't miss about New York is the weather...it's freezing in the middle of November.

And that cabbie screwed me over by taking the longest route possible and using up all my cash.