This Is Where The Title Goes

28

"Got the moves, got the mojo, the most likely to get a cutie-mark around, we got the spirit, work as a team..."

The other fillies ignore AppleBloom.

"We'll get cutiemarks, before the horses, We'll get cutiemarks, before the horses, we'll get cutiemarks, before the horses, we'll get cuuuu-tiiie-marks, before the horseeees..."

Now she's repeating the whole song... I think I might know why the others are ignoring her.

"We got the spirit, work as a team, we'll be the first ponies out on the cuuutie-mark scene..."

They stare up the mountain, a sullen group before this relatively large task.

"No!" comes a familiar voice, "No! I will NOT allow this!"

The fillies spin around and Apple Bloom stops singing.

There is a tall brown and grey pegasus of celestia's royal guard, along with a medium-height medium-white unicorn, both looking hot and bothered, and with plenty of crossed-out numbers on their sheet.

"No! Nonono!"

'Shut up' (the pegasus) stamps his hooves in aggravation.

"No! No going on adventures! No outings! Ponyville will stay in Ponyville until the census is finished, and the rest of Equestria WILL STAY OUT!!"

'Shut up' hangs his head and pants. Mr Educational Figurative Language walks up to the group and wearily asks them where they live, and how many ponies live with them.

"Sorry, but we have to rush off," says Sweetie Belle, "We're on a quest!"

At this, the Mr Educational Figurative Language almost drops his clipboard in exasperation.

"Why does Celestia even need this stuff?"

"It's Queen Celestia, pipsqueak," growls Shut Up warningly.

The two look at each other and sigh again. You can see by all the jumping around we've been doing that Ponyvilleans really are close to impossible to keep track of.

"Also, do you have Fluttershy's cottage on your list?" asks Sweetie Belle apprehensively.

"Yes, one inhabitant..." Mr Educational Figurative Language says wearily.

"Zero now. Just a tree."

"Just a what?"

"A tree."

"A tree?"

"A tree."

"... you're telling me a pony just turned into a tree?"

Shut Up snorts. "Of course she's not telling you a pony turned into a tree. Ponies can't just turn into trees. Don't be silly."

"Yes she is telling him that a pony just turned into a tree," says Silver Spoon.

"How does a pony turn into a tree?" asks Mr Educational Figurative Language.

"That's why we're on a quest to climb this mountain," says Scootaloo.

"Why are you on a quest to climb this mountain?" asks Shut Up.

"To tell Rainbow Dash," says Apple Bloom, "And possibly to get our cutie-marks."

"I don't have Rainbow Dash on my liiiist, please don't tell me ponies live on the mountain," groans Mr Educational Figurative Language.

"No, she lives on a cloud," Diamond Tiara answers.

Mr Educational Figurative Language looks up at the darkening sky, and we can see his brain register the fact that the Ponyvillean skies are dotted with hundreds of clouds.

His pupils shrink.

His ears flatten against his head.

He whinnies nervously.

He drops his clipboard.

...

He's not picking it up.

He's still not picking it up.

"D'you think he's broken?" asks Scootaloo.

"Um..." says Shut Up, prodding Mr Educational Figurative Language.

Mr Educational Figurative Language doesn't move.

"Possibly," says Shut Up.

"Do yah want to join our quest?" asks Apple Bloom... hyperly. (Is that a word?)

Shut Up stares at Mr Educational Figurative Language.

Mr Educational Figurative Language stares at the clouds.

Shut Up sighs.

"Why not. You foals probably need supervision anyway. And we need a break, shove me in Tartarus if I'm wrong."

Ooh yay! Shut Up and Mr Educational Figurative Language are joining us on the glorious quest to the face-off at the top of the mountain! Perhaps the great saga will end there- we're almost at 10,000 words anyway (9576 to be exact (at the 9576, now it's 9585)).

Perhaps it won't.