Wattpad Clichés

49. talking to strangers!1!1!11

taecyeon's sexy ass? 2pm? i'll be? im so obsessed with this song rn omg literally obsessed.

49. THE SOCIAL MEDIA STORIES

SO THESE STORIES.. I HAVE personally never read one. And I know I say this a lot because honestly all Wattpad stories nowadays are just getting boring and tired with all these fucking cliches, but I have honestly never read one of these stories, that I remember.

But obviously I had to read one to write this chapter. These stories are always short, sweet, and simple anyways so I finished it in like a day honestly.

And I hated it.

First of all, the titles. When I looked up the simple word "Kik" or any other simple social media name, I swear to god about a gazillion hits popped up. So many popped up, I was legit scrolling for about five minutes to find one that actually seemed like it would have a bit of something interesting.

Like I don't understand why Wattpad doesn't have a limit to the amount of people that can use a certain title. Some people would feel like Wattpad is controlling them or whatever because of a damn title, but honestly Wattpad wouldn't have to control you if you picked an original ass title.

It's seriously not hard at all. Having an original title makes your story distinctive. I guarantee if you get bored one day and decide to see if your story is one of the first that pops up when you look up the title, it won't even be in the top 200. So, don't get bored with an unoriginal ass title like those.

Next, the dialogue. I can't stand those fucking stories that have that type of dialogue. I need some fucking proper ass dialogue because the shit in those text stories looks so sloppy and just unprofessional.

LukeIsAPenguin: hey whats up

BigBootyBitch: Who is this-

Which brings me to my next topic. Why in the fuck would you reply to someone you don't know?

I don't know about anyone else's High School, but when I was in HS, they showed us these different videos for about the entire first week of school. One of them includes something on internet safety and how you should never reply to someone you don't know.

And even if it's simple social media like Kik, people have tons of ways to find you. There can never not be a way to find someone over any social media. So why would you reply to LukeIsAPenguin if you don't know a cunt named Luke?

Yeah, stupidity.

Also, it's extra convenient that in these stories, they always end up living so freaking close to each other and that they go to the same school.

Let's not consider the idea that there are billions of people in the world and the population increases everyday by maybe 1/4 of a million people. Let's not consider the fact that there are millions, probably billions, of cities all across the world, seven continents, 196 countries (if you include Taiwan), and just the tons of possibilities.

Seems legit.

Now, if this Luke dude gets this girl's kik from one of his friends at school, okay. That happens, and he is trying to keep his identity a secret because maybe he feels insecure yanno maybe he thinks that she won't like him. But I will never understand if this dude just messages her out of the blue and they just conveniently live in the same city.

Seems legit.

And did I bring up that it's always fanfiction? So let me just stop acting like Luke is just a random name that I came up with because all this shit is either Yaoi fanfiction or 5SOS fanfiction.

Fanfiction just has the craziest concepts these days like I can't oml.

Then there's the thing where they feel like they're getting catfished so they get insecure.

Bitch you wouldn't be insecure if you get off of your phone and find yourself a real boyfriend lmao wym you don't know anyone you meet on the internet all too well no matter how hard you try. You never truly know someone anyway, whether you met them on the internet or not.

I mean that's just my opinion so idc if some cunt tries to contradict it.

I also don't understand how people fall in love over the internet. I used to love the show Catfish but now I can't fucking stand it. It just really started pissing me off at how stupid people are.

Like the episodes when the people were actually confused at whether the celebrity was real or not? Not just random celebrities, but A-list celebrities and popular models. Like are you a fucking idiot(well obviously they are but..) let me tell you something.

If so and so celebrity suddenly got a boyfriend/girlfriend, trust and believe that even if it was an internet relationship, everyone would know about it like aSAP. That's how big these Catfish celebrities are.

Plus if you look a celebrity or a model up on Google, this little thing pops up and it tells you all their social media and gives you a link and everything. So all you have to do is look them up and click it and it pops up.

But this isn't about Catfish and celebrities, this is about idiots that fall in love over social media.

Honestly, these stories are so freaking insane it's honestly beyond ridiculous. The logic isn't there. So I don't read them. And I don't bother to. And I don't plan to.

But anyways, if you catch these types of stories in the streets, please tell them to be prepared to cATCH FUCKING HANDS BIT-

No, okay.

If you catch any dumb bitch falling in love with some random dude she met on Kik, teLL HER TO CATCH FUCKING HANDS. Plus, you can't physically fight an online book. That's not Cliché, but it's damn stupid.

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honestly im so annoyed rn i just wrote this is like thirty minutes because i rant when im annoyed. seriously i feel like ill go off on anyone rn. and nothing bad happened so i just feel this way.

BUT ANYWAYZ 2PM'S ILL BE HAS BEEN ON REPEAT LIKE DID YOU GUYS SEE TAECYEON IN THE VIDEO? i've been so in love with him lately it's actually insane. i put the video up in the beginning tho so you can go watch that sexy song oml its such a seductive song and video.

also, give me more clichés to rant about because this is the last one I have in my drafts so rn I'm fucking blank.