how to love // z. m.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Chapter Thirty-Eight


-Zayn's POV-

"Hey, babe," I said, smiling at the girl in front of me. Tears immediately started to fall as she processed that I'd just called her 'babe'. Me... Zayn Malik, of One Direction.

It's so surreal, even today, for girls to react to that like me. Even two years into it.

Two years seems like such a long time. Seven hundred and thirty days.

It still feels like it was just yesterday morning that my mom had dragged me out of bed to The X Factor audition. Who knew I would end up here?

I smiled at the girl again and signed my scribbly signature on the CD jacket she'd brought with her for each of the boys to sign as well.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a slightly familiar face dart through the crowd. I strained my neck and squinted to see through the crowd, and that's when I saw her. The fan that had been talking to Toni earlier. What was her name...?

It started with a D... It was a part of America...

Oh, Dakota.

But if Dakota's here... shouldn't Toni be back, safely behind me?

I was near positive that there was nothing wrong because, well, it's Toni we're talking about here. I'm sure Toni could survive a zombie Apocalypse with nothing but a bag of Doritos, a perfume, and a bottle of wine.

But I still had this gut feeling that something was wrong. If not wrong, at least... off.

I signed another CD jacket and then a poster before turning around in my seat and reaching out to tap Paul's arm.

"What?" he asked, kneeling down next to me.

"Have you seen Toni?" I asked. "Has she come back with Dakota yet?"

Paul shook his head right away. "Haven't seen her. Why?"

"Because I just saw Dakota over in the crowd," I said. Suddenly I was feeling... lightheaded. "She was alone."

"Zayn," Paul sighed, "there are a lot of girls here. And you know there's universal lookalikes. I heard there's seven people in the world that looks exactly like each other, actually. The things you learn from Tumblr..." He laughed, and his gazed wavered to the distance.

"Uhm... Paul?"

"Right." He snapped back into it. "You can't know if that's really her or not. It could just be someone who looks like her, or your mind is playing tricks on you."

"But can you please have someone just go outside and check on her? See where she's at?" I asked, suddenly sounding a bit desperate. And I was.

Paul rubbed his eyes. "We need all of our security here watching after you guys. Dakota seemed like a really nice girl. She wouldn't let anything happen to Toni. Besides, Toni herself is a big girl. She can handle pretty much anything, you said."

"Well, yeah..."

"So, she's fine," he decided. "Now, get back to your fans."

"But---"

"Zayn," Paul said sternly.

I sighed and turned back to face a cluster of teenage girls that were giggling and ready for my autograph. I gave them a half smile and, because I couldn't muster up a genuine smile, I winked at them. That pleased them just fine.

But then I caught sight of Dakota again, more clearly. It was definitely her. And she was on the phone with someone, but looking over at us. Smirking.

And if I didn't know any better, it looked like an 'evil' smirk.

But that's just it...

I don't know any better.

I started tapping my Sharpie on the white table that had been set out for us, and I bit my lip.

If Paul isn't going to have someone go and look for Toni, I'm going to have to do it myself.

But I can't just leave in the middle of a meet-and-greet. That wouldn't be fair to the fans. Not at all.

A slight groan escaped from my lips as I tried to conjure up a Toni-approved scheme that could get me out of here and look for her, but I guess I'm just not as clever as her when it comes to those things.

"Harry?" I said, turning to my left. "I need to use the toilet. I'll be right back, okay? Tell Paul to let all of the fans I miss to wait around afterward and I'll meet them then, okay?"

"Can you even do that?" he asked as he gave a cheeky smile to a tall, beautiful blonde.

I shrugged and stood up, quickly sliding past the tables to the hall. I heard Paul shout after me, but then I heard Harry's voice explaining to him the supposed 'situation'.

I couldn't help but smile.

Okay, so maybe this isn't a crazy, pull-the-fire-alarm-and-blame-Betty-White idea like what Toni would've enforced, but it worked, and that's all that mattered here.

My eyes focused on the large, glowing red EXIT sign above the door at the end of the hall. I knew Toni and Dakota had probably went outside. Who would want to stay in this building when they have the whole of Boston at their fingertips to explore, even if this were a mall?

I flung the door open and stepped outside. I was instantly drenched.

Oh. That could be a reason why. Yeah.

I sighed and pulled up the hood of my charcoal grey jumper. It helps, I guess.

I still had to squint to see through the rain, and I had to keep my hands grasping my hood, otherwise it would fly off my head because of the strong winds circling around me.

I looked down both ends of the street. The right side seemed to just be a long line of business buildings lined up next to the mall I'd just come out of. But to the left, there were a few parking lots and, on the other side of the street and down aways, there was a park.

That looked like a much more probable place for Toni to be at. Maybe she's in the middle of doing something crazy right now. Maybe she's doing a one-man --- or woman, in her case --- rendition of Singing in the Rain. I bet she'd gather a crowd, despite the weather.

To buy time, I crossed the street now and began walking down the cement sidewalk toward the park. I had to pass a few parking lots along the way, though. But all of the fans within Boston are probably back at the meet-and-greet, so I wouldn't have to worry about one of them being in the parking lots.

I walked past the first one, but then I saw a little crowd of people in the park. That must be where Toni is at.

I'll laugh so hard if she really were doing that rendition. Definitely telepathic.

I started to cut across the second parking lot, but this one was a lot different. The other one had a lot of cars parked in it. Mustangs, fancy Volvo's, and Audi's all were taking up space there. But this one was completely empty.

Well, except for a cream-coloured truck. I could just make out, through the rain, one word on it. 'Schwan's'.

I was about to walk right past it, when I heard a muffled whimper, coming from the back of the truck.

Is someone... in there?

-Toni's POV-

My hair fell over my face as I leaned closer into my little ball, trying to warm up as much as possible with the heat left in my body, though it felt like there wasn't any at all. Even the inside of my mouth felt incredibly chilled.

The hair poked at my skin. Wow. It actually is hardening a bit.

I let out a little whimper. I'm turning into a human ice cube.

I gave up trying to find a way out a long time ago. It's no use. No use at all.

I had my legs tucked against my chest an my arms wrapped around my legs, my face buried into my knees. Fetal position. I felt myself losing balance, and I didn't bother to stop myself as I tumbled a little. Now I was in the same position, but on the side, on the ground.

I couldn't even cry anymore. They would just freeze to my face if I did. I think they're already frozen onto my eyes, actually. It hurts to even blink, so I've just been keeping them closed.

Thump, thump.

Oh, what, Dakota has come back to see if I'm dead yet? I don't even know if I have the strength to try to escape if she even opened the door. Come on in, pal.

"Is someone in there?"

My eyes flashed open (ow...).

I know that voice.

Zayn.

"Zayn?" I whispered, tilting my head to look in the general direction of the door.

"Hello?" I heard his glorious voice call as he pounded on the outside of the door. "Can you hear me?"

Oh, I can hear you alright. But I guess you can't hear me.

Wait.. I had just whispered... Right.

I slowly got myself untangled from myself, but it hurt. I'd been in that position for the past twenty minutes, and my clothes had already frosted over, stiffening.

"Zayn?" I croaked, louder. "It's... It's Toni, Zayn."

"Toni?" Suddenly his voice sounded urgent. Like, very. "Are you... You're okay, right?"

"Not for much longer..." I slurred. "This is a f-freezer."

"Oh my God."

Suddenly I could feel Zayn slammed his body against the door, again and again, repeatedly.

"It's locked," he shouted. "Somehow it got locked. It's locked. Oh my God."

Then he went off in a cursing spree.

"Zayn..." I said, leaning closer to the door so that I didn't have to raise my voice. My vocal chords felt really weak. It hurt using them. "Just go get help. I'll try to hold in here."

"If... If I leave to get help..." Oh my God... It sounds like he's starting to cry... I bit my lip and closed my eyes, feeling tears that I thought weren't ever going to come again start to run, warming my skin just a little. "It'll take to long. It'll take to long to get help. I... I need to do this myself."

"Well, I don't th-think you can just bang this door-or open, Zayn-n..." I managed to say. "Please. Get help."

"I..."

There was silence for just moments before I heard running footsteps. Then it was just the sound of my raspy breathing and rain pounding on the roof and sides.

I leaned my forehead against the door, and I reached up slowly to feel my hair. Yep. Stiffening. It's weak ice, I'd say.

Please, Zayn... Hurry...

For lack of pass-time, I started counting the seconds, the minutes as they went by.

Two minutes. Three. Now four.

I was nearing five when I heard footsteps again outside. Then I heard a slight, "Get back, Toni," in Zayn's distinctive voice.

I crawled backward as quickly as my limbs would let me, and suddenly I heard a roaring noise.

The roaring of a chainsaw.

Then came the gritty sound of metal being cut.

My heart nearly skipped a beat as I saw the tip of the chainsaw blade peak through to the inside, and a slip of sunlight burst through. Just a little slit, though.

A minute later, there was a hole. A hole big enough for me to fit through. I quickly crawled forward and began pushing myself forward through it. As soon as my arms were out, I felt someone grasp them and start pulling me gently out.

A moment later, I was in Zayn's arms. He was holding me, bridal style, and I was sobbing into his chest, clutching his soaked-through sweatshirt. He put me down, but I didn't let go of my grip. He had one hand on my back and the other on the back of my head, and he had his face buried in my hair.

"Zayn, where did you get that chainsaw?" I asked breathlessly.

"You don't want to know..." I laughed, but got choked up. I could hear the relief in his voice, though. He was glad I was safe now. That kept a smile on my face.

We stayed that way for another thirty seconds or so before he asked me the question I knew would be coming any time now.

"Toni..." he whispered through his own tears. "Did that fan do this to you?"

"Y-yes..." I mumbled.

He didn't press further. I felt his hands bundle up in fists, and if possible, he pulled me even closer. But in all honesty, it felt nice.

"Thank you, Zayn," I said quietly, but I knew he heard.