I sighed as my husband wrapped his arms around me hugging me tightly as I softly cried on his shoulder. I feel horrible for allowing Bethany to feel this way, I feel like this is my fault. Bethany having sex with Ethan. I feel like it was because Mike and I don't pay her enough attention. Which I hate. Maybe I should just quit singing.
"Mike. Do you think I am a bad mother?" I asked my husband as I looked up at him.
"Not at all baby." He answered causing me to sigh in annoyance me knowing he wouldn't tell me the truth even if it was true.
"Not that you would tell me anyways." I rolled my eyes before sitting up.
"Hey... are you mad at me now too?" Mike said looking offended.
"No. I'm sorry."
"Are you a bit on edge too?" He laughed standing up from the bed me becoming confused.
"Why? Are you?"
"Yeah. I mean we've barley kissed in like six months." Mike replied walking into the bathroom picking up his toothbrush.
"Oh that's what you meant." I sighed in response. I can't take it. I am a horrible wife and mother? How did I think I could do this? Besides the fact that Bethany is disappointed that I don't spend enough time with her now Mike feels the same way? Maybe I'm just not fit to be a mom. Or a wife. Or maybe I am just doing everything wrong that wouldn't surprise me at all.
"I'm sorry I thought we were on the same page." Mike said after spitting her toothpaste out.
"Yeah I thought we were too." I bit my lip standing up.
"Are you going to be upset about this too." He sighed catching me off guard.
"What? Mike what does that mean?"
"You've kinda been getting upset over everything." Mike explained me nodding my head. I just bit my lip before walking into the closet changing into a pair of leggings and a tank top then walking into the bathroom starting to wash my face. "I'm sorry if I upset you." He apologized as I dried my face with a towel. I hung the towel on the rack and walked back into the bedroom sitting on the bed.
"Its fine I understand." I answered flashing him a smile before he sighed. I stood up walking out into the hallway across the house to Bethany's room. "Goodnight Beth." I said peeking my head into her room seeing her lying under her covers on her phone.
"Night. Hey I wasn't saying you are a bad mother if that's what you think." Bethany responded causing me to sigh resting my weight against the doorway.
"Its alright. Get some sleep you have to be up early in the morning for school." I said.
"I love you."
"I love you too." I flashed a smile before shutting her door walking back to mine and Mike's room.
I walked into the bedroom seeing Mike sitting on the edge of the bed shirtless watching a hockey game on the TV.
"No!" Mike yelled I assume after someone missed a goal.
"Mike please..." I sighed him glancing back at me before resuming watching the hockey game.
"Damn it!"
I just laid on the bed pulling the covers over me trying my best to go to sleep although I couldn't due to the TV being too loud. I became frustrated before standing up picking up my pillow and angrily walking out of the room slamming the door behind me.
"What did I do now?" Mike asked following me down the stairs.
"Mike why are you being so incredibly mean to me?" I responded throwing my pillow on the couch turning to look at him seriously.
"I'm not maybe you're just being way too sensitive."
"Why do you have to pick apart every little thing about me Mike? If you hate me so damn much divorce me." I whisper yelled a small tear escaping my eye. I could definitely tell Mike was shocked by what I said and honestly I was too. I never thought I'd ever even think about divorce in our marriage but... here we are.
"Care. I don't hate you. You know that. Why on earth would you even suggest that?" Mike questioned looking at me seriously. I don't want to respond. What was the point he'll just be mad at me and tell me that I shouldn't feel the way I do although I can't help it. I sat on the couch a small tear falling from my eye as I did, me instantly becoming thankful that the lights were off and he couldn't see it. "Carrie..." He sighed sitting beside me as I bit my lip. "Are you really thinking that way? That we should get a divorce?" My husband asked causing me to sigh.
"No Mike. You are just being really mean to me tonight. Why? You said I will never be too much of anything... Now I am too sensitive. I thought you loved every part of me. Whats changed?" I continued biting my lip, me afraid that if I didn't I'd fall apart.
"Carrie nothing has changed I promise." Mike answered holding my hand. "Look I am sorry about tonight. Really. You are right. I have been being a little mean and I apologize. I'm just kinda upset that our marriage isn't the way it use to be." He sighed as another tear fell from my eye. "And that is not to bash you at all in any way baby I promise, part of it is my fault also. I guess I just wish things could go back to how they use to be." Mike confessed.
"Maybe they can't Mike. Maybe they won't." I replied, him releasing my hand.
"Are you thinking about getting a divorce Carrie?" Mike questioned.
"I just-..."
To Be Continued...
This is the end:( but since this one has come to an end I Am starting a new one. I just posted the first chapter to Always Loved❤
