"She was just really upset I felt so bad..." I herd Mike say as I began to wake up making sure I kept my eyes closed. "I love her more than life, more than I can explain but I don't feel like she knows that... When I tell her she nods but I don't know." Mike sighed. I slowly opened my eyes to see him standing in the bathroom doorway his back facing me. "Yeah, she said she feels like I will want to be more intimate because of it but that's not true." He added turning around seeing me looking at him. "I have to go. Yeah love you too." Mike said hanging up.
"Was that your mom?" I asked curiously.
"No." He answered sitting on the side of the bed. "It was yours." He nodded me sitting up.
"Um. Wh- why'd you tell her about yesterday?" I stuttered slightly confused.
"Because I am worried about you..." Mike replied looking into my eyes. "You have been getting upset a lot lately and I don't know if its just because of me or what..." He added as I tucked a few strands of hair behind my ear.
"Well I'm sorry, I am already on edge if you know what I mean. But no its not you Mike. I just get frustrated sometimes. With myself." I explained causing Mike to sigh.
"Well honey I want you to be happy." Mike said putting his arm around me.
"And I am." I said looking into his eyes before placing my hand on top of his. "I'm not unhappy in anyway Mike. Just too sensitive." I confessed gently biting my lip.
"Your not too much of anything baby." Mike smiled before softly kissed my lips rapping his arms around me. "Carrie... You know I love you right." He said before softly kissing my cheek pulling me closer to him. "I really really love you baby." Mike added softly kissing my neck causing me to giggle us falling back on to the bed.
"Mike... Don't get too carried away." I said as he softly kissed my collar bones.
"Not promising anything."
"I'm serious Mike." I replied gently pushing him off of me.
"Babe I was kidding." Mike said hugging me tightly. "I wouldn't do anything if you didn't want to." Mike said holding my hand kissing my cheek.
"Its not that I don't want to... I kinda can't." I said with a small laugh.
"That's alright." Mike smiled hugging my waist as he kissed my cheek. "Do you want me to go pick up some breakfast?" Mike sweetly asked holding me tightly in his arms.
"Why don't we go together? Maybe eat a little breakfast then go on a hike?" I suggested with a small smile.
"Sounds wonderful baby." Mike replied before gently kissing me. He smiled the two of us standing up from the bed. I went into the bathroom washing my face then brushing my teeth before I began curling my hair. I am quite excited to spend the day with Mike. I don't feel like I've had a good past two days and I hate that. Normally I am an extremely happy person. I don't like not being happy.
"Care honey can I ask you something?" Mike said walking into the closet where I was pulling on my jeans.
"Depends." I answered standing up straight as I slightly became nervous.
"On what?" Mike said confused.
"What the question is." I answered letting out a small laugh.
"Not gonna chance it." Mike said causing me to frown.
"Go ahead." I sighed.
"With John-'
"No." I said before pushing past him walking out of the closet into the bedroom.
"Care-"
"I'm not talking about it." I said cutting him off for a second time. "Sorry." I sighed slipping a shirt over my head.
"Care honey I just want to-"
"I said no Mike." I sighed looking at him seriously. "I don't want to be reminded of what happened so please just stop." I added before walking down the stairs. Suddenly I was in a bad mood. I hate talking about John or anything reguarding the attack. I don't want to talk about John, at all and him just bringing it up made me upset.
"Carrie." Mike said walking down the stairs. "Can I at least ask you? If you don't want to answer that's okay." Mike said walking over to me noticing a tear falling from my eye his expression immediately changing. "Care honey why are you crying?" He asked worriedly as he wrapped his arms around me, sitting on the couch.
"You don't understand. You don't know what he done to me. Mike he beat me, he hit me over and over again. And when he was done he raped me. Pressed up against the wall his hand wrapped around my throat, Mike why would you want me to talk about that with you?" I asked now crying.
"Baby..." Mike sighed attempting to wrap his arms around me but I quickly pushed them away.
"No Mike stop. Why would you want me to do that? Why would you want me to talk about it and make me feel even worse. Please tell me what the hell I did to deserve that." I cried before standing up grabbing the keys off the mantle before walking out of the front door, getting into my car. I couldn't even bring myself to pull out of the driveway considering I was crying so hard but I couldn't stop myself.
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First chap out of two❤
