CW!! This part contains descriptions of anxiety and just general bad feelings and low self-esteem. As usual, I'm just warning those who are triggered by these topics. Read responsibly!
~
The irritation and general discomfort that Jisung feels continues with no signs of stopping. He's lost essentially all patience he'd had prior to this point in his pregnancy. That's saying a lot too, because he was never particularly patient to begin with. Now, even the sound of Changbin's breathing is about to send him into a fit of rage.
"Why do you keep doing that? Can you stop it?" Jisung suddenly asks the alpha as they sit across from each other at their desks. The room had been relatively quiet besides the sound of Yongsun discussing something with one of his other coworkers. Changbin looks up at the younger in confusion at his request.
"Stop what?" Changbin questions with a furrow in his brow and a tilt to his head. Genuine confusion is painted over his features.
"Breathing like that." The omega responds and this only deepens the alpha's look of confusion.
"Like what?" The black-haired alpha continues to question him dumbly, and Jisung keeps himself calm with a deep inhale and exhale.
"You're breathing unnecessarily loud and you don't usually do that. Can you stop?" Jisung requests again and Changbin frowns with a mixed look of confusion and offense.
"I'm breathing just like I always do. Normally." Changbin replies back and the snark in his tone fans Jisung's irritation even more.
"No, you're not, and now I feel like you're doing it on purpose to annoy me." Jisung bites back and Changbin rolls his eyes with a sigh. "Whatever. You want to be an asshole, fine, but do it somewhere else, please." The omega snarks, irritated by the older's attitude and unwillingness to just admit he was being annoying.
"All I did was breath! If you don't like that, put your headphones back on, or how about you go somewhere else?" The older man retorts and Jisung narrows his eyes in a glare. The omega puts his headphones on, but not without sending Changbin a very rude finger.
The black-haired man just shakes his head in response to the younger's nasty gesture and they both return to their work. Jisung feels like he wants to cry and he's not really sure for what. He just takes a deep breath and fixes his gaze on his screen.
Eventually, he starts to feel a little better but still off, and he needs to share an audio file with Changbin. "Check your email" the younger removes his headphones for a moment to tell the older and the alpha's immediately replying back.
"Are you done being a dick now?" The alpha says it with a light joking tone, but it immediately sets the younger off.
"Oh my God, you're so fucking annoying. If I ruin your day, just like you're ruining mine, I'm the dick, right?" Jisung snaps and the alpha looks at him with shocked wide eyes. "I'm a dick, seriously? After you've been doing shit on purpose to piss me off all day? Get fucked, Changbin" he rants as the older glances around in confusion and embarrassment.
"Jisung-ah," the most senior of their coworkers, Wonsik, intervenes before Changbin could reply and possibly make the situation worse. "Maybe you should get some air?" The beta man suggests and Jisung doesn't snap at him. He just stands up with a deep shaky breath and leaves for the restroom.
As soon as he's in the restroom alone, he bursts into tears. He's not initially all that sure why. He's probably just overwhelmed after the emotionally charged moment. He feels bad that he'd yelled at Changbin like that, like some sort of monster. His coworkers probably think he's insane and he doesn't blame them. There wasn't any reason for him to lash out like that. He's so embarrassed.
He feels like he has no control over his body anymore. He has no control over his emotions. Everything feels wrong and too much. He's just so out of his depth and it makes him anxious and on edge. Not only is he anxious, but compounded are the constant feelings of inadequacy, rejection, frustration, insecurity. They all stack on top of each other and make it hard for him to breathe at times.
Jisung cries in the restroom for what feels like an hour. Then he has to get himself together and get back to work. He can't even look at Changbin when he comes back to his desk. He doesn't look at anyone. His eyes are still swollen from crying and he probably smells like distressed omega. Its just an overall humiliating situation, and he just wants today to be over so he can be alone.
He wanted to apologize to Changbin, but the alpha ends up having to leave early because of an emergency. Jisung would've liked to ask what was going on and if everything was okay- Changbin is obviously still one of his closest friends, but he doesn't feel like he deserves to know or to be spoken to at all. He gets really down on himself and self-deprecative. This is a bad habit of his when he's anxious.
It feels like an eternity passes by before Jisung can leave work and go home. Changbin is still on his mind, and he still feels guilty. It takes him a lot of working himself up, and typing, then deleting, and then retyping but he texts Changbin to check up on him.
Han Jisung (3:17PM): Hey hyung, is everything okay?
He feels jittery when he sends the message, but forces himself to do it. Immediately he's overthinking and wishes he would've apologized first. Acting like nothing happened isn't right... but that's what they always do.
Changbin-hyung (3:21PM): Hi, yes. I'm fine.
Changbin-hyung (3:21PM): Yongbok started his heat and my mom had a doctor's appointment so she couldn't come get Nabi until later. I left so I could pick her up since none of us were prepared for it to start so suddenly.
The explanation makes a lot of sense. Felix did tell the omega he thinks he was in preheat a day or two ago, but he also said he wasn't really sure. It sounded like he was to Jisung though, because he was apparently clinging to Hyunjin more than usual and crying a lot. Both early symptoms of estrus.
Changbin-hyung (3:24PM): Are you okay?
The older's next message makes the omega bite his lip nervously. He knows exactly what Changbin is really asking.
Han Jisung (3:29PM): Yeah, hyung.
Han Jisung (3:29PM): I'm sorry about earlier. I was being mean and I feel really bad about it. I shouldn't speak to you like that.
Jisung feels a little relief after sending his last message and Changbin responds quickly. The older's next message gives him all the remaining relief he needed.
Changbin-hyung (3:30PM): I can't believe you're apologizing first right now. Never thought I'd see this day ㅇ_ㅇ
Han Jisung (3:30PM): I'm growing up, hyung. What can I say? ㅎㅎㅎ
Changbin-hyung (3:32PM): I'm so proud, I could cry ㅠㅠ
Changbin-hyung (3:36PM): How much do you wanna bet that Yongbok will be pregnant by the end of this year? ㅋㅋㅋ
Han Jisung (3:38PM): How perverted of you, hyung
Han Jisung (3:43PM): ₩40000 that it will be before August
Changbin-hyung (3:46PM): My birth month? You're sick.
Changbin-hyung (3:46PM): Deal.
Changbin-hyung (3:49PM): He has a crazy breeding kink though. Hyunjin will 100% fail the pull-out test.
Han Jisung (3:47PM): That's disgusting. I could've went my whole life without reading that. I'm going to say goodbye now. Bye.
Changbin-hyung (3:47PM): Wait, don't leave me ㅠㅠ
Han Jisung (3:48PM): Nah I'm leaving. The vibe's kinda weird here =.=
YOU ARE READING
What to Expect When Expecting in an Omegaverse: Minsung
FanfictionHan Jisung's life is just beginning when he finds out he's pregnant by Lee Minho, a casual friends with benefits, after his birth control fails. He feels like his world comes spiraling down and he has to deal with the unforeseen consequences of his...
